Do you ever find yourself all wrapped up about a future outcome feeling like you are fending off negativity at every turn?

While obviously and physically here right now, most people barely visit the present moment rushing from past regrets and future trauma. The human mind has the incredible capacity to draw you back into the past and/or propel you into the future, all while you go about your day-to-day life.

Just like you, I love to relive old memories and dream about the future, in fact daydreaming and visualizing your desired outcome is advised. What you want to watch for is repetitive cycles of self defeating thought.

As I describe in my best selling book, The Map: Finding the Magic and Meaning in Your Life, you are living out a narrative of your life. Some argue they would not tell their story this way.  Maybe heartbreak has crossed your path.  Maybe you are in a life or career challenge that you didn’t see coming.

In the book I lead you through a profound process to discover the inner landscapes you inhabit on your path—the unseen patterns, hidden motivations, and family legacies—and show you how to break free of whatever is holding you back from the super amazing and meaningful life that is your birthright.

If your thoughts are stuck and you can’t see the next logical step, you might be doing a little ‘Time Wandering’–living “some-when” other than the present moment. Here’s a short quiz to find out when you’re often living:

•    Have you ever found yourself back in frustrating situations that are eerily similar to your past and make you feel powerless?

•    Does your mind often wander to past relationships or old frustrations or “failures”?

•    Do you ever run scenarios in your mind about conversations you’ve had with someone or are about to have with them, taking your attention off, say, driving your car?

•    Have you ever found yourself sitting in a meeting and running through scenarios that have nothing to do with your surroundings?

•    Do you sometimes find yourself anticipating the worst to happen, just like it once did in your past experience? (I.e. He/She will leave me, just like the others.)

•    When you’re frustrated with something in your life, do you tend to focus on your past or future rather than deal with your current emotions and experience?

If you answered yes to any of these questions (and I don’t have to be psychic to suspect you had at least one yes!), it’s a sign of being “some-when else.” And, when you’re some-when other than the present, you are never in the now.

As I’ve often said, right now is where all your power is! In this moment alone is where you access the magic wand to direct your life.  Of course, there’s absolutely no shame in having slipped back into an old landscape or in getting caught up in anticipating a future event, we are all story-telling beings, after all.  That is why I am launching the Master Intuitive Coach® Institute. There are more people than ever who need the processes I have discovered along the way.

You see that you have the power to choose your perceptions about whatever you’ve experienced.

Stop and go back.  Read that again.  You can learn to change your perceptions about your past.  You must choose it. IN-Vizion ® process, available at the Master Intuitive Coach® Institute training, is the preferred method to transform memories of lands you traversed long ago, and even awaken new memories to shore up your new perceptions.

Remember, now is where all your power is to shape your Map—past, present and future!

Exercise:

Close your eyes as you focus on your breath. Let all your thoughts fade away and then ask yourself: Where am I? Allow your inner awareness to show you where you are and this place’s features.??Then, in your journal, take some time to describe the landscape you were just pointed to, and then answer the following questions: Have you been here before? Are you in the future or past? How do you feel here? What lessons are to be learned here? Have you been here before? If so, does it feel like you keep coming back for a reason? How can the experience of being in this particular landscape help you today?

The Master Intuitive Coach® Institute is a new and exciting integrative coaching program designed for anyone who is interested in becoming a coach, looking for a new skill set to add to their coaching, counseling or therapeutic healing practice or even if you’re someone looking to experience your own personal transformation, growth and development- there is something here for YOU! http://masterintuitivecoachinstitute.com

I know it’s sometimes hard to see the abundance in our lives, especially in today’s changing world where few of us have been untouched by economic concerns. But, even during tough times, we still have everything we need and more. In fact, prosperity can be ours no matter what’s going on in our lives and around us. It’s all a matter of the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs we CHOOSE to live by.

Each day I talk with many people who are worried about money and work. In fact, I’d say that 99.99% of my readings lately have touched on fears around job losses, financial difficulties, and working through transitions. There’s no doubt that we’re living in times of unprecedented transformation, challenge, and opportunity. Both on a personal and global level, we’re being called to higher consciousness. As part of this metamorphosis, each of us is being invited to redefine what wealth and prosperity means in our lives.

Many of us have tended to view terms such as “wealth,” “rich,” and “prosperous” as something outside of us that we’ll eventually experience when we finally get more than what we have now. But, the truth is, wealth starts from WITHIN us! Prosperity isn’t about what you have; it’s a state of mind and being. It’s what you value, the thoughts you think, and the beliefs you hold, that determine the riches in your life.

My road to prosperous living was by no means direct. As I talk about in my first book, Remembering the Future, I struggled in my 20s with addictions and used a variety of things—alcohol, shopping, drugs, food, men, and so on—to fill what I felt was a void inside me. It wasn’t until I embraced the Divine within me that I was able to become clean and sober. With that recognition of the ever-present power of Spirit within me, I let go of my focus on things. I became more giving, worked harder for the higher good, and acted with more faith, compassion, and forgiveness. The more I transformed on the inside, the more the Universe showed me it was possible for me to live prosperously. The tragedy of my parents losing everything shortly after I became sober further showed me that prosperity isn’t about what you have, but instead about who you are.

And so, without further adieu, I give you the top eight insights on prosperity that have made the greatest difference in my life and the people I’ve worked with.

Create your personal definition of what it means to live prosperously. While our culture has tended to look at prosperity as meaning having lots of money, the truth is it involves much, much more.  You are prosperous to the degree that you living a full, satisfying life. What does this kind of life look like to you?

Know that you deserve to live prosperously no matter what. Many of us have been lead to believe that we don’t deserve happy, abundant lives. Others of us have been taught that wealth is bad; somehow it is more heroic to struggle in life. This isn’t true! Prosperity is divinely ordained for each of us, for it enables us to live our lives to the fullest.

You get what you see. The more you observe and bless the prosperity and wealth you have in your life now, the more you have. The more you observe scarcity and not enough, the more you create the experience of not enough. So, it’s crucial that you pay attention to the economy of your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs! I also highly recommend keeping a gratitude journal to help you train yourself to see the abundance in your life.

You cannot get something for nothing. While your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs are a major part of living prosperity, so are the actions you take. As I like to say, you can’t be an armchair astronaut! Your business isn’t going to just come together if you’re sitting at home on your couch. You have to take steps to find the fantastic friends/ partner you want, apply and network for the perfect job, take steps to good health, ask for a raise, and so on. If you want a fulfilling life you must continue to take action on your dreams, knowing that the Universe will support your hard work.

You can always give something. As with the old idea of tithing, the world is your church and distributing your wealth to others ensures the flow continues. I’m not necessarily referring to donating money, but giving your service and generosity to others. Remember, you can only keep what you’re willing to give! And, there is always something you can give.

Create space for your dreams. One of my favorite books on prosperity is The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity by Catherine Ponder. One of the points she makes is the importance of making room in your life for what you want by getting rid of what you don’t want. So, it might be time to let go of the clothes and furniture that no longer suit you, or even say goodbye (with love) to any people in your life who no longer feed your soul. Nature abhors a vacuum, so when you begin to move out what is no longer right for you, you make space for the greater good to come in.

Trust in the support of the Universe. Remember that self-will alone isn’t enough to make things happen. While it sometimes might seem like things are being withheld from us, it’s usually because something better is in store. For example, we might be laid off from a job we hate in order to create the space needed to get one we love.

Invite the Divine to bring miracles into your life. We all co-create our lives with the Divine. As you continue to take action on the above, you must surrender your desires to Spirit, and trust that they will be fulfilled for the highest good of all and for the true manifestation of your purpose in Divine appropriate timing. One of my favorite exercises is to write a letter to Spirit in which I share my desires and affirm my commitment to working towards them. Then, I surrender it all to the Divine with trust that what is mine will not go past me. Try it now!

Remember, we are all rich people living in a world full of infinite treasures. There’s not only enough to go around, there’s endless abundance. Nothing is missing for you. Even if you feel you’ve lost something, remember that you’re making room for something better to come. The Universe is full of amazing possibilities and actually wants to support your highest good!

In love and service,

Colette

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the    love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people   you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a  free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many    giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

Maybe you’ve been daydreaming about moving to a new place, starting a business, setting a boundary, telling someone how you really feel, or simply doing something outside your usual box. Perhaps you just know that you’re being called to take action, but yet you just can’t seem to and so you may have become stuck, bored, or even depressed?

There is one thing that tends to interfere with living a full, authentic life. No, no, it’s not missing out on having a reading with yours truly. It’s the big bad Goblin of Fear!

First, I want to point out that fear itself isn’t a bad thing. At its core, fear is actually friendly. A natural act of love and self-protection, it’s a biologically-rooted system that’s working on our behalf 24/7 to warn us of possible threats to our life. Fear teaches us that our love of life is profound and hard-wired into our being.

But, here’s the rub: this survival instinct also doesn’t determine the difference between what is truly life-threatening and what we THINK might be threatening. And so, fear comes in countless different shapes and sizes and it plays itself out in all kinds of situations—fear of what happens if you take a risk, of putting yourself out there, of rejection, of intimacy, of flying, of heights… I could go on and on.

My point is that WE ALL experience fear. The important question isn’t whether you’re worried about something, but how you perceive and respond to those fears. Do you let them stop you from following your heart, from revealing who you really are, or from standing up for yourself? To live a truly authentic life and continue to evolve, it’s crucial that we “feel the fear and do it anyway,” as the popular saying goes.

The problem is that so many of us have been taught that fear is bad and so we try to avoid it at all costs. As a result, our fear grows into a Goblin, who then takes control and makes us a prisoner in our own lives.

If you’re familiar with my work, you’ve probably heard me talk about the Goblin before. I use the metaphorical character of the Goblin to represent the wounded ego we all have. As I talk about in my book, The Map: Finding the Magic and Meaning in the Story of Your Life, the Goblin holds onto what we’ve disowned in ourselves. The more you try to avoid “feeling the fear and doing it anyway,” the more you feed the Goblin of Fear. As he takes over your life, he just encourages you to find more evidence that your fears are real and persuades you to lock yourself in your “Me Bubble,” where it seems you can at least play it safe, no matter how bored, unhappy or powerless you might feel. He convinces you that you cannot accomplish your dreams, keeps you from living your truth, and tells you to not speak up. As he runs the show, you become disconnected from the Divine and your intuition and the possibilities before you dwindle.

Ultimately, fear isn’t something to avoid or even to conquer (as many “experts” tell you), but rather it’s an emotion to feel, experience, own, and love. Yes, LOVE! When you acknowledge this Goblin and send him love and compassion, you lull him to sleep and awaken the guidance of your higher self. With the Goblin quieted, you see that you’re truly never alone and that Spirit doesn’t give you anything that you can’t handle. You know that you really can “feel the fear and do it anyway,” for Spirit will support you every step of the way.

Exercise:

Make a list of all the things you feel called to do. It could be anything—find a new job, ask for a raise, speak up to someone, do something new, ask someone on a date, and so on. Then write down all your fears for each. When you’re finished, ask yourself whether each fears is truly valid. Do you see real evidence of failure?

Next, go through the list and send love and compassion to each of them.

Close your eyes and allow your intuition to guide you. What do you need to do to feel the fear and do it anyway? What parts of yourself do you need to embrace? Perhaps confidence, trust, or surrender.

Finally, challenge yourself to take action on one fear this week. Feel it and do it anyway! And, report back!

Please share YOUR advice on embracing fear. What’s worked for YOU?

In love and service,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the  love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people   you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a  free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many   giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

So, what do I say? My answer to these types of questions often elicits a perplexed look. I tell him or her that they should first consider their motives behind their motivation to become more advanced. “Sometimes,” I say, “you have to first forget your desire to learn more advanced techniques and get back to basics. Sometimes all you need to experience increased awareness is to have humility and be like a child who is seeing something for the first time.”

Of course, I just LOVE everyone’s thirst for knowledge and enlightenment. The desire to grow and learn is essential if you want to harness your power to create the life you long for. I also LOVE sharing new ideas; so in these moments it’s often difficult for me to not talk about an alternative technique.

But, advanced isn’t always better. In fact, our search for more sophisticated, advanced tools can actually hinder our growth, block our intuition, and prevent us from experiencing the very fulfillment and happiness we think they’ll bring about.

Now, I know what I’m saying is not what you’re used to hearing. Throughout our lives, we’re taught to strive to be advanced, sophisticated, and better than the rest. Even in the spiritual realm, we’ve somehow been lead to believe that we must become advanced if we want to have it all. With the growing pressure to be perfect and better than the rest, there’s been a trend toward spiritual snobbery.

Yes, I just used the word snobbery in a spiritual context! But, I’m exactly not referring to “snob” in a “mean girls who talk about you behind your back” sense of the word. When I say spiritual snobbery, I’m talking about approaching spirituality as if you should know more than another, are above others in your development, need more advanced tools to connect with Spirit, or must be spiritually sophisticated to be a good person.

Now, if you recognize any spiritual snobbery tendencies in yourself, there’s no need to beat yourself up. I’m willing to bet all of us have unconsciously fallen into the trap of spiritual elitism from time to time.

The problem is this kind of quest for sophistication not only keeps us stuck, but it also separates us from the All That Is!

Of course, I’m not saying you should stop growing spiritually. You should! But, as you seek out new knowledge, it’s important to still have humility and approach all of life with fresh eyes.

We’re always at the beginning in some area of our lives. Even when we think we know everything there is to know, we still need to approach things as if we’ll learn something. No matter if you’ve done the same meditation a hundred times or feel like you know all your patterns, with a change in perception and a dose of curiosity, you’ll always see something new.

The truth is that no such thing as advanced. No soul is—or can be—more advanced than another soul. Yes, each of us is unique with our own path. But, no matter how much we’ve read or practiced, we are all equals and just as deserving of love, happiness, and enlightenment.

When you think about it, this is one of the amazing wonders of life! You can be sophisticated, but life is smarter. When you surrender to this “not knowing” and approach all of your experiences with humility and curiosity, you’ll always find a new nugget of gold that will further help you on your path.

Exercise:

Look Through Your Childlike Eyes!

This week, focus on having humility and curiosity, even in your daily to-dos. Let go of the desire to become advanced and improve, and look instead with fresh eyes. Be like a child with wonder as you take your usual walk, do the same old meditation, or pick your daily oracle card, all while knowing that new awareness will come from even the basics. If you need to, get back to the intuition 101 and simply go for a walk knowing that Spirit will help you open your eyes to a new message.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Please share them!

In love and service,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the    love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a  free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many  giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

In today’s youth-focused culture, aging is viewed as something to be fought off as long as possible. Even for the most liberated of us, growing old can feel like a threat to our self worth, our confidence, and even our very identity. But, it doesn’t have to be that way!

Growing older is an inevitable and—dare I say—beautiful fact of life. From our first breath to our last, we’re here to experience, to grow, and to evolve. With the right mindset, aging can become an incredible gift—one that is full of wisdom, strength, purpose, adventure, and more and more fun.

It’s funny how as children, we can’t wait to grow up. We count the days to our birthdays, daydream about blowing out all those candles, and delight in all the presents. Yet, as we move through our 20s and 30s, and the dreaded 40s, many of us start to cling to the lower numbers and begin to dread each passing year. Unfortunately, this all too common mindset is a recipe for unhappiness, stress, and hopelessness. The more we long for the years gone by, the less we’re able to enjoy the present, which is where all of our power is.

I can still vividly remember the first time I looked in the mirror only to discover that two crevices had suddenly appeared around my mouth. At 32, I’d just started to feel like I’d come into my own and my life had more purpose than ever before. There I was about to meet a friend for dinner and going about my usual routine of getting ready. I went to the mirror to put on a bit of lipstick when I discovered these two seemingly gigantic wrinkles that seemed to have appeared in the midst of only a few hours. Who was this person with these laugh lines? What was going on?

I felt a bit stressed and somewhat worried about this new discovery. Of course, I knew that I wouldn’t have the glowing skin and firm booty of a twenty-something forever, but up to that point in my life, aging seemed like a distant thing. My initial stress and shock wasn’t so much about getting wrinkles as it was about facing the reality of my mortality. In that moment, it hit me–just like everyone else, I was going to get old and my body would eventually die.

We’ve all had moments like this. While difficult, they also empower us to grow and change our perceptions. Yes, our physical bodies are going to die, which is a difficult truth to accept. But, with this acceptance comes greater power and a stronger connection to the Divine.

Life’s magic is everywhere, even in places that seem wrinkled.

When I look back on that moment in the mirror, I can see that it was one of life’s mini wake up calls. Once I embraced those two new lines and the fact that I was indeed getting older, I was finally able to make the shifts I needed and wanted to make in my life. I was able to get clearer about my purpose and finally had the courage to walk that path. Embracing aging inspired me to cultivate a deeper connection with Spirit. And, I also become more dedicated to living fully in each moment and adding more fun to my life.

Now into my 50s, I celebrate each passing year—and each new laugh line—with more enthusiasm than the last. I just turned 53 in July, and had the most fun-filled weekend of riding my Harley motorcycle, holding hands and snuggling up to my gorgeous husband while seeing Harry Potter, and indulging in a little bit of cake and ice cream. I practice moderation and I make a point to consciously love and accept my body flaws and all! I spent too much time berating myself for my weight, cellulite, wrinkles, ad infinitum. I have learned that loving myself now in all my perfect imperfections is the answer!

OK, you might be thinking, “But, Colette, I just can’t get over the flaws I see in the mirror.” Or, “There’s no way I can embrace my age with all my health problems.” Or, “I’ve made so many mistakes and have so many regrets, happiness and adventure at my age is impossible.”

Here’s the thing: We are all getting older, it’s just a matter of whether we decide to do so with passion and purpose or to do so kicking and screaming!

When you refuse to accept your age or continually loathe yourself upon glancing in the mirror, you end up trapped in the Ghostlands, where there’s no learning or growing because you’re so focused on the past. (To remind you again, there is no power in the past or future—only the present!) As I talk about in my book, The Map: Finding the Magic and Meaning in Your Life, this kind of obsession with the past only prevents you from experiencing joy in the present and planning something better in the future. It just keeps you unhappy and stuck in your mind. The more you dwell, the more time gets away from you; before you know it, you’re sleepwalking through each day, losing the valuable time you do have while you’re fixating on the time gone by.

Ultimately, when you choose to embrace the process of aging, you tap into the incredible power of the present to co-create the purposeful and authentic life you desire. Moreover, with that positive change in mindset, you’re actually bound to look and feel lighter, happier, and even younger.

Exercises:

Get Out of the Ghostlands!

In order to move through the Ghostlands of Aging, it’s crucial to get out of any denial and to ventilate your emotions. I know firsthand that getting older isn’t always an easy process. It’s natural to resist it and to feel angry, confused, regretful, and so on. Rather than keep all of these feelings inside you, it’s important to let them out so you can move on. Either spend some time writing in your journal or write a letter to Spirit about your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs on aging, growing old, and even dying.

Age-Embracing Rx

Gratitude and Humility?No matter what’s going on in your life, you have to honor what you have now in the present and be grateful for it. You have to heal yourself and find beauty in your life today. When you practice gratitude and surrender your fears to Spirit, you gain the power of perception and open yourself up to the magical doors of possibility and even better goodness to come. So, write a letter to Spirit in which you turn over your fears and worries. Then, make a gratitude life. What’s good about your life right now? What do you love about yourself?

Take Out a New Lease on Life!

This is the perfect time for a self-inventory so you can open your eyes to what you want to experience in the years to come!

Looking back on your life so far, what are you most proud of? How have you grown and evolved? What might you have done differently?

What are your dreams for the coming years of your life? Who do you want to be? What would you like to do? What new memories would you like to create? How do you need to grow and evolve to become the person who lives this life?

In love and service,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people you know on facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

Everyone experiences feelings of anxiety and unease from time to time. In fact, it’s a very normal reaction to stress. It helps us deal with a tense situation in the office, study harder for an exam, and keep focused on an important speech. In these situations, it helps us cope and become more alert. But, what do you do when you’re feeling dread, panic, or anxiety more often than not?

From worry about our health or job security to fear about what might happen down the road, more and more of us are living in a constant state of anxiety. And, it’s no wonder! Many of us are juggling so many responsibilities and challenges in life that our own peace of mind and self- care end up on the back burner. Moreover, it seems not a day goes by without some panic-inducing news flash about economic strife, environmental degradation, terrorist threats, and so on. All of this is taking a toll on our physical, mental, and spiritual health. In fact, according to the National Institute of Mental Health, more than 19 million Americans have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. At any given time 13-25% of American adults are experiencing heightened anxiety. It’s also been estimated that 75-90% of all doctors’ visits are due to the effects of stress. That’s a lot!

But, here’s the most fantastic news. You truly can conquer anxiety and overwhelm. Here are some of my favorite anxiety-busting tools, which I’ve used in my own life and in my work with clients.

The Landscape of Peace and Calm: As I talk about in my most recent book, The Map: Finding the Magic and Meaning in the Story of Your Life, the environment of your mind—the internal landscape of your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs—is what creates your experience. The problem is that it’s incredibly difficult to shift what’s going on in our mind with willpower alone, especially in the midst of heightened anxiety. But, as I show you in the book, when you can easily make such a shift when you engage the power of metaphors and imagination. When you explore your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs as enchanted environments where your emotions take on attributes of the outer natural world, you’re able to detach from your emotions and access the wisdom you need to transform your inner and outer experiences.

Here’s how you can do this to shift out of anxiety.

First, think of whatever is making you anxious. Then close your eyes and imagine your anxious thoughts, feelings, and beliefs as an environment. Perhaps when you feel anxious, it’s like running through a dark forest with giant ghost trees jumping out of nowhere. Or, maybe it’s like a stormy ocean with ominous clouds above. In your journal, describe your landscape of anxiety.

Now, think of a time when you’ve felt calm, peaceful, and happy. Then close your eyes and picture those feelings of calm as an environment. Perhaps it’s a sparking pond with a rainbow above. Or, maybe it’s lush garden of sunflowers.  Once again, describe this environment in your journal.

Which landscape would you rather be living in? You do indeed have a choice! Now that you’ve plotted these two points in your consciousness, any time you feel anxiety take a moment to recall these two landscapes and remind yourself that you can make the choice to be in the one that’s more appealing. By picturing the calm landscape, you’ll find it’s much easier to connect with the calm emotions that come along with it.

Meditation: Among the many proven benefits of meditation is stress relief and peace of mind. Neuroscientists have actually found that people who meditate shift their brain activity to different areas of the cortex—brain waves in the stress-prone right frontal cortex move to the calmer left frontal cortex. This mental shift decreases the negative effects of stress and anxiety, and they were calmer and happier than before. There is also less activity in the amygdala, where the brain processes fear.

Meditation also enables you to move beyond the busy ego mind to that peaceful place within your consciousness where you’re connected to the All That Is and your intuition. When you meditate, you’re able to step back from the anxious chatter and can more easily shift your perspective on whatever is bothering you.

The Art of Mindfulness: Another form of meditation is mindfulness, which involves bringing your awareness to the here and now and simply noticing what you’re thinking and feeling without judgment. Instead of working against the voice in your head, you sit back and “observe” your thoughts—just notice rather than become involved in them. As you observe them, the thoughts often become less stressful and you start to see that it’s not the thoughts themselves that are causing anxiety, but rather the power you give them.

Focused Breathing: Emotions and breathing have a reciprocal relationship:  when you’re feeling anxious, nervous or upset, your breathing quickens and may even become erratic. And, when you’re relaxed and composed, your breathing is slow, calm, and rhythmical. By working with your breath, you can calm your mind and emotions.

Here is an easy breathing technique for stress reduction:

Touch the tip of your tongue to the top of your mouth, just behind your teeth. Then inhale slowly through your nose, counting to four. Feel the breath filling your lungs from bottom to top. Hold your breath for a count of seven seconds. Then exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of eight seconds. You might even want to picture yourself exhaling the thoughts that are bothering you.

Seek Out Support: Just talking about your anxiety with either friends or a counselor can do wonders for helping you let it go. In fact, the mere action of saying your worries aloud often enables you to shift your perspective. If you’re up for it, you might talk about it in a very dramatic fashion, using all sorts of descriptive words. Then, tell it again. By the fourth time, it usually becomes silly and you have a good laugh.

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned in my own life and in my work with clients is that sometimes you have to say no in order to say yes to something more affirming.

Before you keep reading, pause for a moment and think of one thing you need to say no to. Now, with that in your mind, let out a great big “NO!” No soft-spoken muttering. Really belt it out, even if you’re out and about and have to run into a restroom.

Go on… I’ll wait for you!

No, how did that feel?

For many of us, this simple, two-letter word brings up a whole lot of discomfort, awkwardness, and anxiety. As children, we likely heard “no” so often that we grew to see it as a bad, offensive word. Many of us were also raised in homes where our needs and feelings weren’t valued, and we were taught to put others’ desires before our own. We naturally want to be liked, and we may not like disappointing others because we know how bad it feels.

But, here’s the thing: Saying yes when your intuition is screaming no actually does WAY more harm than good. Not only does it cost you time and erode your self-esteem, but it also limits your power to co-create with the Divine. Moreover, people pleasing actually damages the very relationships you’re bending over backwards for because the motive to please is actually self-centered and not authentic to both parties. None of this is good!

Ultimately, if you want to live an authentic life, you must do what’s in your highest good, even if that means saying no and disappointing people. Every time you say “Yes” to something that you don’t feel 100% about (whether it’s to going to a party when you’re tired, gobbling down a tub of ice cream, a second date, or anything else that doesn’t feeding your soul), there is a consequent “No” to a future opportunity that you can’t take advantage of. And for every “No” you say, there is a corresponding future “Yes” in the form of space for the universe to fill with something better.

Exercises:

Say Yes to the Magic of No!

Where in your life are you saying yes when you really need to say no? Take some time to journal about these areas.

Say No with Grace

Next time someone asks you to do something, pause and get clear on what’s in your highest good. You might also want to ask yourself, “How would I respond if I knew he/she wouldn’t be upset with me?”

If you realize that saying no is indeed in your highest good, then that’s the answer to give. If you feel anxious or worried, take a deep breath and remind yourself that it’s completely normal to feel uncomfortable when you’re moving in a new direction; the more you trust your intuition on what to say no to, the easier it will get.

For example, if someone asked you to watch their dog for a week, but you’ve been working long hours and are already exhausted, you might say, “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I’m in the midst of several projects right now and have to work late, so I won’t be able to watch your dog.”

There’s no need to over explain or defend yourself. Just tell the truth with grace and care. While you can’t manage another person’s emotions, you can control how you choose to make your point.

In love and service,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the    love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people   you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a  free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many    giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

As I mentioned in my recent blog, Spirit on Wheels: What I Learned in Motorcycle School, I recently fulfilled a long-time dream of getting a motorcycle. While I’ve discovered this sport is not for the faint of heart, I’ve continued to hit the grindstone and practice everything I learned during my lessons.

I spent hours upon hours working on my motorcycle techniques on a small motorcycle that was provided for the Riders Edge safety and skills class. When I wasn’t practicing my figure eights in the parking lot at Harley in class, I was visualizing myself doing them perfectly. I was indeed getting better each day. But, I was also having high expectations of myself and had started to beat myself up because I felt I wasn’t progressing quickly enough. Truth be told, I got my license but deep down didn’t have the confidence I thought I should have.

Of course, I knew that the pressure I was putting on myself was completely unrealistic. After all, I was brand new to this sport and Rome wasn’t built in a day. But, alas, I was determined; I’d spent all this money on this big, beautiful bike, so I just had to master riding it!

So, a few weeks ago, I decided it was time to ride my bike with Marc of course there to help me. We decided to take her out and just practice down my street. Sitting on her without the kickstand on the road was nothing like sitting on her in the dealership with someone holding the bike while I balanced it. Hmmm.

I started to panic because the weight was twice what I learned on and froze in fear. What on earth had I done?? Marc was encouraging however and fearful or not I started the bike and effortlessly began to sail down the street. That said I had not noticed that my feet were in a completely different position and had no clue what gear I was in. I rounded the first corner quite easily then couldn’t make the next turn, completely forgot everything I learned and headed straight for some garbage cans and a lovely manicured lawn (not so nice now). Down went the bike and down went me too wearing my wonderful helmet, and so very little damage was done other than to my ego and my already plum lower lip.

As Marc heaved my beautiful 900 lbs Soft Tail Deluxe back to Harley for repairs, I realized it was time to accept my limits . . . my bike was just way too big for me.

I was ready to just take a break from motorcycles all together, but my husband convinced me to go back to Harley Davidson and get a smaller bike. He said he’d take over the big bike so that we didn’t waste money on it. While he wasn’t a fan of the maroon color, he was willing to sacrifice looking a tad less manly. Isn’t that sweet?!

It’s time to embrace my inner novice and take things slow. At half the size, and ½ the weight my Harley 883 Superlow is much easier to handle. So, no more beating myself up for not being able to ride the big bike! Even if I have to spend all my motorcycle days driving around the parking lot, I’m quite content to be learning.  And I am content to be driving a bike that properly fits my skills and confidence level. I am a cautious driver and now I am super cautious! The new bike is so awesome and so easy for me I feel great but I know that I am a beginner and need more experience before I get on the road.

Have you ever found yourself trying to go from 0 to 100 just like that? Do you expect yourself to be an instant expert in something and then beat yourself up if you aren’t?

When starting something new, it’s important to give 100% to the experience. But, it’s just as crucial to accept your limits. So many of us tend to beat ourselves up for not having perfect super hero abilities, even when we’re new at something. The truth is, when you embrace your limits and see your fumbles as part of the process, you’ll be more successful in the long run and have more fun.

As the Novice card in my Wisdom of Avalon Oracle Deck notes, we’re always at the beginning of some area in our lives. Only when we’re humble and accepting of our limits do we discover the real magic in the experience. Yes, it may feel like you have two left feet, but with patience and slow movement you won’t stay a novice for long.

That said if you fall off a horse – get back on and don’t give up no matter how embarrassed you are!

One thing I do know now that those burly men I talked about in the last blog were yelling at me for my own safety not just because they wanted to be macho. A fresh perspective is always a good thing.

O and I didn’t cry!

Exercise: Embrace Your Inner-Novice!

Go try something that’s completely out of your area of expertise and commit to embracing your inner novice. You might even tell people you’re new to it and ask for help. Be humble, accept your limits, and have fun in the moment. If you fail then try it again until you master it!

Let me know how it goes!

In love and service,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

I know, I know… us psychics are supposed to be home meditating and looking into crystal globes—not out riding motorcycles. But, I’m starting a new trend.

So, I took the plunge and decided to drop by a Harley Davidson store to have a look around. My husband and I wandered around the store, sitting on one cruiser after another and chatting with the salesman. Then I saw it—this beautiful burgundy “Brandywine” Softail Deluxe sitting in a corner, and I knew instantly that it had my name on it. (Quite ironic that I’ve been clean and sober for over 25 years and was about to walk out with a Brandywine cruiser.) Mind you, I hadn’t actually ever driven a motorcycle. But, I reasoned, we all have to take a leap of faith from time to time, right?! I just knew deep within my bones that I was going to be a natural on my bike. All I needed was a few lessons and then I’d be home free, cruising down the highway in my fake leather motorcycle jacket. (Even with my new motorcycle image, I’m sticking with animal friendly gear!)

Donned in my pink sparkly goggles and shiny white helmet, I showed up at the Harley Davidson safety school last week all ready to rev up my engine. But, it turns out, riding a motorcycle is much tougher than it looks! You’d think that since I’m intuitive, I’d have a natural sense of what to do. But no siree! As an empath, I immediately started to pick up on all the mixed feelings of the people around me and promptly turned into an uncoordinated hot mess.

It started with these two burly instructors who barked that I shouldn’t be nervous. Only, the more they told me not to be nervous, the more I panicked. And, the more I freaked out, the more they yelled at me to get it together. While my fellow classmates elegantly glided into park, I kept stalling in front of the instructor. It was beyond embarrassing. Eventually, so overwhelmed with emotion, I started crying. And, that’s when it happened… I got yelled at!

“Hey, there are no cry babies at motorcycle school!” one of the burly men barked.

Embarrassed and distraught, I ran to my car and called my husband, Marc, sobbing. I mean, who knew that the clutch had to be pulled in at the same time you’re shifting gear?

What if I’d never be able to ride my bike? What if I just wasted all this money on something that was going to sit in the garage? My husband didn’t want the color, so it wasn’t likely he’d use it. I could have just bought a nice pair of sunglasses and saved the rest!

But, thanks to a pep talk from Marc, I persevered. At the very least, I’d know more than the next beginner class . . . should I have to come back. It was time to get out of my comfort zone and surrender to the instructors, who knew what they were doing. My face streaked with mascara, I sauntered back to class and sat back on that iron horse with great hopes that I wouldn’t fail.

I kept at it all that afternoon, forging ahead despite the aching pain in my hands from pulling the clutch and the new constellation of bruises on my legs.

By day two, I realized that I could at least keep my bike upright. And, when no one was looking, I was able to do beautiful figure eights. (The minute I sensed someone’s eyes on me, my bike somehow just wouldn’t cooperate.) Even though we were told to use both brakes, I’d tense up and fly past while everyone else came to a halt. Wee! The instructors continued to grimly shake their heads and remind me what I was doing wrong, but I reckoned that at the very least I was having way more fun than they seemed to be.

As the day wore on, I surrendered my need to control the outcome. Even if I failed the class, I was still getting better at my figure eights. The more I let go of all the worries in my head—the possibility that I might fail, my fear of the burly men, and the anxiety over how much money I’d spent on a bike I may never use—the better I was able to drive in the moment.

On the way home that night, I thought about the whole experience so far. I realized that even as an adult, I don’t take criticism well. The two burly instructors reminded me of my father and the whole experience brought back memories of grade school. It was like I was a child again, having to surrender to the people in charge and relearn how to follow directions. Sheesh, who knew motorcycle school would be such a mirror, reminding me of old patterns from the past. Perhaps Spirit thought it was time I had a little refresher on the importance of taking direction when I’m not the expert?

When my alarm went off on day three, I felt paralyzed and unable to get out of bed. Between the cold that was starting to stir in my head and my aching muscles, I reckoned I’d rather spend the day eating my oracle cards. But, today was my last day of school. We even had a test! So, I dragged myself out of bed, put on my gear, and made a double espresso for some extra oomph and twice the good luck.

In the end, I just barely passed by three points. In fact, all twelve of us in the class passed. Our burly instructors, who I’ve now decided are really just big teddy bears, gave us funny certificates of achievement. Mine said, “So, that’s how it’s done. The one who passed even though she had the hardest time following directions.”

Motorcycle school reminded me that you have shake things up at least every once in awhile. You never know what you’ll learn and how you’ll grow when you take a leap out of your comfort zone. When you break out of the same old rut, you’re propelled to live in the moment, where you connect with the All That Is and the power of synchronicity. And, I was reminded that in the end, who cares what anyone else thinks, even big burly men!

I’m thinking my next adventure will be skydiving, though perhaps I might just lie down and meditate to soothe my shattered nerves.

Exercise: Try Something New!!!

Try one new thing this week. There’s no need to be extremist, just step out of your comfort zone. Perhaps take a class or lesson or go somewhere new. Trust your intuition and then commit to fully embracing the experience. Let go of any worries or judgments and stay in the moment.

Let me know how it goes and what discoveries your make about yourself!

Now, I’m off for a big excursion to do figure eights in the parking lot.

In love and service,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.

Oracle cards are one of the most powerful tools for tapping into the flow of Divine synchronicity. When you choose certain cards, they’ll reflect the state of your present, patterns and issues from your past that continue to influence your experience, and future potentials. They reveal what you may not see with your own eyes and empower you in making choices for your highest good. But, as with any method meant to engage the light, there is a shadow side to it.

When we become crazed about knowing everything in advance, or we look for signs at the expense of making rational choices, what should be a sacred dialog with the Divine becomes the shadowy, destructive force of oracle abuse.

Oracle abuse happens to the best of us. As humans, we long for safety, security, and to know that our desires and needs will be take care of. There’s nothing wrong with any of this and connecting with the Divine will only enhance and expand your experience. But, when your desire to know how things are going to turn out becomes an obsession and you do readings over and over, it’s no longer empowering. You hand your power over to the cards and take yourself out of the present, where all of your power is. You also unconsciously set yourself up for supporting lack in your life!

When you do too many readings out of obsession, you disconnect with the power of the Divine guidance and your intuition. If you’re familiar with my work, you’ve probably heard me talk about the Goblin—the metaphorical character I use to represent the wounded ego we all have. Your Goblin whispers fear, anger, guilt, jealousy, shame, and all sorts of other negative, limiting emotions. He is the part of you that acts out from beliefs of abandonment, self-denial, entitlement, arrogance, and self-hatred among other things. By keeping you focused on ego fears, he breaks your connection to the Divine and, as a result, your intuition. Oracle abuse is one of the Goblin’s trademarks!

I have a client who recently emailed me in a tizzy. She’d done so many readings about this guy she was dating, that the cards were now giving all sorts of mixed messages. One minute this guy was the Grail Night from my Wisdom of Avalon deck. Then an hour later she wanted to make sure he still had potential so she grabbed my other deck, Wisdom of the Hidden Realms, and picked the Sacred Union reversed. Confused by the mixed messages, she picked again and got the Hungary Ghosts reversed. Mad that she didn’t get the Grail Night as a confirmation that it was “correct” the first time, she went to my website and got The Goblin. Now, she was more confused than ever!

I sympathized with my client’s longing to know the outcome. It’s very attractive when you have a system of a language that will tell you things that are hidden. But, it will send you down a rabbit hole of madness! I know from experience; when I first met my husband, I must have done at least ten readings and boy did those cards get nasty after awhile. See, I teach what I’ve learned so you don’t have to make the same mistakes!

Anytime you do an oracle card reading with anxiety behind it, that emotional state will also be reflected in the answer. If you keep asking the cards, they will start reflecting your obsession and hidden Goblins. So if you’re crazed and obsessive, you’ll get crazed and obsessive signs to remain that way until you bottom out. Oracles then act as catalysts, forcing you down the same path until you can’t take it anymore.

I don’t have to be psychic to know that you don’t want lack in your life, nor do you want to disconnect the power of Divine guidance. While I know my Wisdom of the Hidden Realms and Wisdom of Avalon cards can be so powerful it’s hard not to become addicted (just joking!), it’s important to know when to just say no and put away the oracle cards!

Exercise:

Whenever you do an oracle card reading, it’s important to come to the table centered and neutral. So, before any reading, ask yourself: “What is my mental state?” If it’s not centered and neutral, pick up your journal instead and make a list of your agendas. Ask yourself why you’re so anxious or obsessed, etc.

If you’re in the midst of engaging in oracle abuse right now, commit to not going back to your cards until you don’t care what insight you get.

Finally, take some time to meditate, which will help you get centered and detached!! Put your Goblin to sleep using my Goblin Meditation here.

In service and love,

And please, if you found this information useful, then spread the love and use the Share This link below to share this post with people you know, facebook or twitter.

Become part of our wonderful community with a monthly draw for a free 15 minute reading with Colette, our newsletter, and so many giveaways. Go to the HOME page and join now!

.