Do You Think All the Good Ones Are Taken? It’s Time to Change Your Mindset!!


Updated: February 11, 2010


Have you ever found yourself mumbling that there just aren’t any good men or women left? Or, maybe a friend has adamantly declared that all the good ones are taken and you both should just go join a nunnery or monastery?

“are there any good women or men left?”

I’ve come across many single people on the verge of giving up on love because they can’t seem to find good partners. I know meeting people can be tough, but I’m here to tell you that there are tons of fantastically great single men and women out there. You just have to train yourself to see them!

“there are a lot of great partners out there”

If you look at the world thinking that there aren’t any good single men or women, you’ll only see the “no good” prospects. But, if you walk around with a mindset that there are tons of amazing people just waiting to meet you, then you’ll find those amazing partners.

“there are tons of amazing people just waiting to meet you”

eh5One of the best ways to retrain your mind to see the many great single prospects out there is to browse online dating sites as a form of meditation. Just go to one or many online dating websites and browse profiles of men/women for 15-20 minutes a day for 30 consecutive days. While many of you know I met my husband Marc online and am a big proponent of online dating, this exercise doesn’t require that you sign up and contact people. Rather, by just browsing the profiles of people who want to meet someone, your subconscious mind becomes coherent with your new belief that there is a plethora of great men/women out there.

“there is a plethora of great men/women out there”

isp-dating-002Going online is also a great way to gauge who you are now and who you need to become to find the right partner. If you want to take it a step further, pay attention to the types of profiles that peak your interest. Use your intuition to get a sense of what that person is like and why you gravitate to him/her.

“Look for any red flags: yours and theirs”

For example, you might notice that you tend to click on all the heartthrobs who are holding beers in most of their photos. Or, you notice all the women who say they’re only looking for fun. Keep browsing and pay attention! When you notice someone who has the qualities you’re truly looking for, think about who you need to become to be with this type of person.

“be the person who would attract the perfect partner”

Browsing dating sites is like stirring the pot—it signals to the universe that you’re ready for a great partner. Again and again, I’ve had clients and friends do this online browsing meditation for 30 days and then meet their partner while out and about at places like gas stations and coffee shops. I also know many people who have ended up with someone they found online while retraining their subconscious, including myself!

“go shopping, try your prospects on like they were shoes. Look for the perfect fit, because there is no such thing as the perfect shoe”


“And beware the eye candy shoes…. they give you blister, bunions, sore feet and sore legs, find comfortable, a fit so you can be yourself”

Remember there’s a lid for every pot. In fact, there are lots of great lids for every pot. So, start stirring the pot!

Exercise: Visit one or many online dating sites (i.e.,,, etc.) and browse for 15-20 minutes each day for 30 consecutive days. Start today and report back on your experience!



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