The Spirit of the Holidays: What Do I Do if I’m Someone Who Feels Too Much?!


Updated: November 30, 2010

worriedWomanIs the holiday season messing with your moods, cravings, or energy?

When you’re clairsentient, or what I like to refer to as a person who feels too much, the holiday season often brings about a double whammy of highs and lows. As I mentioned in my last blog, The Spirit of the Holidays: How to Rise Above Old Family Patterns and Dramas, everything gets triggered during this time of year—old wounds, tensions, patterns, regrets, addictions, destructive habits, and so on. As all these thorny emotions simmer around us, those of us who are clairsentient often end up being unsuspecting passengers on a wild rollercoaster of emotions that don’t even belong to us.

Those of us with the intuitive gift of clairsentience are able to feel or sense subtle forms of energy. As empaths, our feeling sensory is extremely heightened, and we can psychically tune into the emotions around us, whether from a person, a place, an animal, or even an object. We pick up on body language, tone of voice, body movements, hidden meanings of what is spoken and not spoken, underlying emotions around us, and even insight into past, present, and future life occurrences. Some of us are born as clairsentient, but we can also develop this intuitive sense as a means of self-protection in the midst of difficult childhood experiences. This gift enables us to be great listeners, healers, lovers, friends, and leaders. But, it also makes us psychic sponges; we soak up others’ anxieties, worries, fears, and anger and then feel as if all those emotions are our own. Without the right tools, we tend to get so full of others’ “stuff” that we in turn tend to struggle with mood swings, emotional eating, weight gain, anxiety, depression, and/or exhaustion. As if all that isn’t enough to weigh us down, all the swirling emotions make it difficult for us to connect with our intuition and Spirit’s messages.

If you’d like to get a better idea on whether you’re clairsentient, take a moment to look over the following questions:

  1. Do you tend to pick up on the moods around you?
  2. Do certain people leave you feeling drained, unworthy, and/or even physically ill?
  3. Do others, even strangers, frequently pour out their feelings to you?
  4. Do you often feel compelled to fix other peoples’ problems?
  5. Do you tend to turn to food or addictions for comfort?
  6. Do you often feel an urgent need to start snacking (especially on sugary and heavy foods) around 4 p.m.?
  7. Do you care more about others’ well being than your own?
  8. Do you tend to feel anxious or overwhelmed when you’re in a crowd of people?

If you answered yes to four or more of these questions, you’re likely clairsentient.

In a world that focuses on facts and science, those of us who are empaths often second guess ourselves and wonder if it’s all in our head. It’s not! In fact, as humans we’re biologically wired to feel empathy for others. Neuroscientists actually recently discovered “mirror neurons” in the brain, which fire when someone engages in an activity or merely witnesses someone else who is engaged in an activity. In other words, when we see a homeless person, we’re wired to put ourselves in that position and feel compassion. Even without this new discovery, the proof is in the pudding and it’s important to honor whatever is your unique experience.

So, how do you get off the wild rollercoaster of others’ emotions? As a clairsentient who struggled for years with extreme sensitivity to the energy around me as well as emotional eating, I know firsthand what works. I’ve also personally experienced my fair share of the emotional ups and downs and weight gain that often comes to people who feel too much over the holidays. Here are the most important steps you need to take:

Get grounded: Grounding yourself involves making a conscious connection with your true essence. It’s about nourishing your connection with Mother Earth and getting out of your head and into your physical senses. When we’re grounded, we’re most connected with Spirit and our intuition. On the other hand, think of the popular expression “spaced out,” which happens when we’re preoccupied with some emotion and leave out bodies. When we’re spaced out, we’re like an astronaut in outer space, floating along at the whim of others’ feelings.

WinterMy favorite activity for getting grounded is spending time in water. If you heard my show last week, I mentioned my daily ritual of swimming or taking a bath at 4 p.m. each day. The late afternoon is typically the most difficult time for clairsentients, especially when it comes to emotional eating. At that point we’re so full of others’ emotions that we attempt to ground ourselves through food. Spending time in water at that time is one of the most powerful things you can do to prevent emotional eating and moodiness and reconnect with your true essence. Another good way to get grounded is to get out into nature each day for a walk or some relaxation.

Recognize what is yours and what is theirs: As you go about your day, check in with yourself and ask where your feelings or cravings are coming from. Are they yours? Or, are they coming from someone else? This is especially important if you find yourself in the midst of any family dramas over the holidays!

Boundaries, boundaries … and more boundaries: Did I mention boundaries? Make a list of the people, places, and situations that tend to drain your energy and commit to limiting your time around them. Likewise, notice what leaves you feeling energized and commit to spending more time in the around those people, places, animals, and situations.

See the gifts: Remember your clairsentience is a gift and makes you uniquely you. So, embrace it! Take some time to journal about how being empathetic makes you special. Think of how you’ve helped others, how your psychic sense has helped you, and what gifts you’ve brought to the world.

Meditate: Meditation is an invaluable tool for getting centered and back in tune with yourself and your intuition. Through meditation, we’re able to better distinguish between our true emotions and all the other stuff that is being projected onto us. So, commit to spending at least 10 minutes a day meditating. I highly recommend my Tree meditation for centering yourself.

If you’d like to get all the tools you need to conquer the emotional eating and weight gain that so many of us clairsentients struggle with, I’d love to have you join me for my new live online program, Weight Loss for People Who Feel Too Much, starting December 15. I specifically created this online seminar and support forum to guide you through the holidays as you face the most difficult time of the year for weight gain, emotional overload, family issues, and food frenzy. For more details, click here.

In love and service,


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  • Rhonda F

    I’m just finding this information, at just the right time for Spirit to reveal it! I was unable to go deeper into what you discussed about this. Growing the gift and how it relates to weight .. just all the ibgo I can get…

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