Here’s to Kindness!

Updated: November 23, 2014

Dearest you,

A friend of mine posted a cute but deeply meaningful note on Facebook that began “Dear Mean People” suggesting we all take responsibility and commit to kindness over cruelty. I second that.

It’s what I love about my friends. They move quickly and nimbly past nasty comments from strangers through the gamut of  “why don’t you like me” to “ wow that was abusive” to “did someone really say that?” to an existential perspective on why kindness and consciousness should be the measure of true prosperity. It’s what makes me love Facebook sometimes.

“Everyone needs a hug”
Yup I think that’s about right.

What is it about the internet now anyway?
Everyone with a computer has a voice and can have some kind of influence on others.  I know I’ve brought this up before but it bears repeating.

It’s so easy now for bullies to hide in the cyber-bushes ready to pounce on anyone who appears to be doing better, seems to have more, or perhaps achieved a dream they wanted but never did anything for.
The underbelly of all this connection is the dark repressed disappointment of the wounded and afraid. Even they get to share and project their rage and jealousy, judgment and perceived failure on others.

Freedom of speech regardless of outcome.
Silencing is not the answer.

I’m personally tired of barbed comments from people who claim to know me who have never met me, or worse ones who have, who construct a negative story to support their perception that if I succeed it might take something away from them.

Do all bullies, haters and trolls have this in common? Do they all have this gaping god- shaped hole in them that causes them to be mean to others? Cut off from Spirit the world is closed, contracted, finite, and hopeless, mechanical at best seen through the eyes of the disappointed disenfranchised ego.

Here’s my view – no one is born hating. No one is born wounded, or evil or afraid or feeling less than.
We have to learn to be like that.
We have to learn to be disconnected from God.

My husband was trying to build something on our property that required a permit. He first had to go through the town planning council. Therefore a visit by a number of people from the town planning council to decide if this would be allowed or not was required. A whole party of 8 members showed up one morning to look at the project. One woman attended who was very nasty and negative and no matter what, refused to listen and shot down any ideas from the group. My husband in his wisdom just looked at her leaking negativity all over our backyard and refused to let this poison continue. She was obviously having a bad day. He looked at her and said “ you look like you need a hug” and went over and hugged her. Shocked and melted from that point on she became very helpful. That one act of compassion and kindness from my husband changed everything.

Everyone has the same capacity for love, for purpose, for peace, joy and the kind of prosperity where kindness is a currency and faith in a Higher Power is the bank. Everyone is born magical.

So perhaps that’s the answer.
Relentlessly remember who we are underneath our “woundology” as spiritual teacher Carolyn Myss calls it.
Relentlessly remove the victim stories that are like contagious viruses.
Smile, and smile a lot, smile at strangers even if they’re snooty, and do it without expectation.
Sometimes people are invested in feeling crappy and mean.

So here’s my formula for peace, purpose and prosperity:

Find God
Do no harm.
Work out your S##T.
Forgive, release, repeat.
Be kind to yourself.
Be kind and show compassion to others.

At the end of the day maybe haters just need a hug.
It’s never about you anyway.

I send bushels and baskets of hugs and smiles and unicorns with fairy dust and BIG Love to all –even the “dear mean people” who need it the most!

PS – As this is the Thanksgiving holiday in the USA, as a gift of gratitude to all of my fans all over the world who can’t get to see my TV show yet, and those in Canada who go to bed early since the show is on late, I am gifting you with permission from the VisionTV network in Canada with an episode of my new hit show Messages From Spirit.
I hope you enjoy it and feel just a teeny bit of the magic and healing present in the room for all of us. I walked away from this with one important lesson.
Spirit is real. We don’t die. Love is only the Answer.




Showing 38 comments
  • Janine

    Two weeks ago I went on a journey to find your cards at a retail shop.
    The place I decided to go only had the “Enchanted Map”, I found quite funny because it was the deck in which I chose daily on you website.
    You daily cards have guided me through turmoil, in which I felf I had no direction weather it was how to act emotionally or to with hold until timing was good. Even to the point of decision making.
    These cards literally have saved relationships from confict or misunderstanding. Different as financial choices.
    When you came to Salt Lake years ago I knew from walking into the room you were a true valiant healer to teach us and show we all here do have power to control our lifes. And with the spirit in tow it certain does make it worth it.

    • Safena

      Dear Colette,
      I want to thank you for all that you do. I believe wholeheartedly in you. And because I do when I am in fear or doubt I think of your gift and it is a beautiful reminder that I am not alone. I am loved and protected and their is a divine plan. I have needed this recently more than you can imagine. Pls keep doing what you are doing. You bring hope and keep faith alive. AND pls take exceptional care of yourself. I have watched your magical show (i live in Canada) and you are giving everyone 1000 percent so pls give back to yourself.
      Love Safena.

  • Diana Boles

    Today I am thankful for……………it is the one post I’ve been leaving on FB since the begining of November. Since I have started doing this, I haven’t sensed any of the things that hurt my feelings! Not the things of the recent past, distant past nor the daily bump and grind. Am I ignoring it? Is it just not happening? And I suddenly find myself drawing only the lovelies to me! Like today—a loving, happy little girl was walking with her mommy, giving her mom a hug & kiss and then looked at me, stopped walking and said to me “I like your hair”! I was full of delight just watching their interaction and was grinning over that. So I was just overjoyed by her darling interaction with me! And imagine this, I was a wreck–ran quick to the store after spreading mulch and raking leaves and didn’t even comb my hair at all today, let alone wash my face!
    Every one of us has a jigsaw part of spirit that locks into the jigsaw piece that your neighbor carries within them. Sometimes, we have to turn the tile to make them fit together.
    Today, I am thankful for the power of SPIRIT

  • Diana Boles

    P.S.—how do we get to view this Message from Spirit episode? I am so anxious for your show to start here, this is an awesome treat!

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      Diana if you scroll down the actual newsletter the link is right there in the photo ;)but try this link it’s up till midnight on Thanksgiving

      • Diana Boles

        Thanks, toots! That worked perfectly —– as did your releasing interactions with your audience — Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family. Mwha!

  • Jan G.

    Thank you so much for this message about mean people. I’m going through something now that relates so well to this subject. I’ve been looking for the light in all this darkness and know in my heart that something good must come from the pain of it all. What you have written is like a hug for me and opens me up to being able to hug the “mean person”. I send you lots of love and hugs for everything you do.

  • Dee

    Dear Colette,
    Thank you sooo much for todays message. I recently escaped from a relationship with someone who became unbelievably mean and cruel. A bully. Lately I have been telling everyone I know that I am on a crusade against meanness. You are so right, these people are completely disconnected from spirit. We can only counteract this by amping up our light and kindness and surrounding us with likeminded people to support us. Blessings to you.

  • Paul

    Colette, I am in what I pray and know is a temporary job. I am under-employed compared to my background but I was quite sick and as a result off my professional path. I work for a company with a few mean people but one lady that works next to me is unbelievable. She belittle’s me, tells me I don’t know what I’m doing and throws me under the bus every chance she gets. At times it seems surreal to me that anyone can be so mean. I often wonder what must have happened to her to make her like that. It is affecting me, I don’t sleep well, Iit affects my attitude on the job at times and it affects my health. I will find something else soon, which is a whole other story, but your blog caused me to write this. I live with a bully all day and it affects me a lot. I know others experience this.


  • Caitlin

    You’re awesome. That’s all.

    Lots of love,


  • Linda

    This is such a nice post—thank you for this!

  • Julie

    Hi Colette,
    I liked reading your message this morning it reminds me why I have to keep rising above this. So we can have a better place for all of this us more love. I heard a quote earlier this year and it seems to be my theme song. Hurt people Hurt! If I can remember not to take it personal this chant starts to play in my head. We are all at a different place on our path and some of us need so much love! I live in Canada so I’m able to watch the new show its great. I don’t spend a lot of time with liked minds in my everyday life, so watching the show reminds me of being at the show this summer and how much energy and love was there! I need the light and love so that I can keep trying to help make a difference. Thank You for this.
    Hugs Julie

  • Julie

    Thank you kind Colette…for your words…your wisdom….your authenticity.
    I agree with each word and am grateful for the reminder that one act of kindness will (not could) change a person’s day…and several acts of kindness daily will change lives, inspire people and better the universe. I don’t think there is ANYTHING more rewarding than simple act of kindness. Warms the soul like absolutely NOTHING else…no commission check compares…no promotion…not recognition…not even finding out that exactly what you wanted to buy is 75% off (haha)…nope…nothing…nada …nee.
    There was a woman who worked in my daughters school. Mean spirited to the highest level (and this was in an elementary school). I tried everything. being nice. Compliments. bringing banana bread.. (is there nuts? I am allergic to nuts..she barked) I smiled while inside i wanted to wring her neck…”No nuts…just fresh banana…hope you like it”…I may have gotten a grunt of gratitude but I cannot remember because I was focusing on the tongue in my mouth that was bleeding from biting down so hard to keep it from becoming sharp with sarcasm and anger. One day after witnessing a particularly awful exchange with a young mom and this woman… I had enough. I was fuming. It seems watching others be abused is even harder than taking it on myself. I prayed. I found myself in the book store and bought a book called “the power of kindness”…I had it wrapped extra special and even spent extra cash on a beautiful bow. I bought a card and wrote a simple note…something like..I am working on random acts of kindness today. I thought you might enjoy this book! I know I did…have a beautiful day!
    with love, Julie
    Part of me thought this was rather passive aggressive…but I i am relatively certain my motives were pure…

    She was a different person. it works.

    Colette…you are an angel sent to remind others in this world that love is the answer. That kindness is what matters. That gratitude is the key. I, for one, am truly grateful with a heart overflowing with love…that you are in my world today! THANK YOU and have a blessed day! xoxoxo

    • Dominic


      There are a few books with that title, who is the author of the book you are talking about?

      • julie V

        Hi Dominic, The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life
        by Piero Ferrucci …here’s to being kind to everyone we meet…and even those we don’t! 🙂

        • Dominic

          Thanks Julie!

  • Donna Paris

    Good Morning you beautiful spirit!
    Just wanted to send you a cyber hug and let you know that you are so loved! Enjoy your Thanksgiving!
    Much love & light

  • June

    I have all your decks.I just love them and the course I took. Thank you.Have a wonderful week GOD Bless you.Sending you much love.
    much Love. Have a great week

  • Theodora Bakopanos

    I loved your show. I would love to see more.

  • George

    Bingo! Great message. Thanks and best wishes to you!

  • Jen

    I find the thought running through “what is a good man but a bad man’s teacher? What is a bad man but a good man’s job. I like this article and the responses. At times I can be unkind and mean, sometimes choosing, other times by reacting instead of sitting with something. I know personally, how a smile or kind word can help lift up. I attempt when someone is mean spirited to remember that I too have been there, knowing that reacting to it would escalate or draw it out more. Helps keep humbleness, and gratitude close by. LOl and when not a lesson of compassion.

  • Tracey

    Love your show !!!
    I was so blessed and fortunate to have been able to attend one of the tappings!
    Love you x0

  • Jocelyne

    Love you Colette, and not in a weird way! 🙂

  • Victoria

    Dear Collette…I just, just watched an episode of Messages from Spirit…and IT….WAS….FABULOUS!
    WHAT A GIFT you HAVE….I don’t know how to put this delicately…BUT…I’m in the “funeral business”..Sounds harsh, but truly, I’ve been singing and playing at funerals since I was 14 (and I’m reaching dinosaur status)…I now preside at them….HONESTLY….people are SO looking for answers…and truly, YOU ARE TAPPED IN! I SO WISH I could “tap in” the way you do….especially when I’m preparing homilies for families…however….it’s probably not my work….BUT…IT IS YOURS!
    THANKS for your “Service to Humanity!” Truly….this is a huge service…Sending Love and HUGE HUGS!
    Go gently…

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      BIG GIANT thank you’s I am so grateful for your post and it sounds like you know your work and it is important 😉 oxoxox we are who we are meant to be

  • Rena Scarberry


    I just watched the episode on line. I loved it and shared with some folks. I hope this goes world wide!

    Thanks again for sharing, Love, Rena

  • irene

    I know what you mean about mean, nasty people out there and as a sensitive soul, it’s hard on me too. I ‘m sending you a big hug and what your hubby did to hug that lady was very powerful. What a great guy you have!

    As I have shared with you many times, your guidance and words is spot on for me literally. Each week, each day the help I get is enormous as it always relates so exactly to what I am experiencing in my life. That’s so cool. Yesterday I turned 50, and the guidance for the week helped to prepare me so much for how things were going to unfold for me causing me emotional upheaval of course, but had I not gotten to “see” into the future it would have been much worse on me. So thank you, as always thank you. Even as I was shedding tears on my 50th bday, I was holding in my minds eye, the Dragon, knowing I have the strength to get through the emotional hardship and kept also focusing all day yesterday on the card for the Day, and your words, Forgiveness. So, naturally, this week’s forecast I get and thank you. You are an angel. A pretty angel.

    love you,
    Irene (Gardenia on FB)

  • Genene

    I rarely watch television–perhaps once a year. 🙂 But I LOVED your Messages From Spirit show. Hope we can receive all the episodes soon here in the U.S. Thank you!

  • Tina

    Hello Collette. I really look forward to your weekly words of wisdom and I absolutely love your new show. I recently lost my brother Greg so I understand how wonderful it can be to hear from the other side. Love and blessings on your new and exciting journey with your television show.

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      sorry for your loss… even though we don’t die we still feel the loss when someone crosses

  • DLLGRJandfurballs

    LOVE watched the show, very happy to hear it felt healing … integrity is worthy for the long run relationships. Just holding on to the Lady of Lightening hoping it will all be positive and most needed. Ups an downs on thoughts. Busy working – need blessings. About hugging … the recipient has to “be receptive to accept it” for healing. LOVE : )

  • Amber M

    “barbed comments”…”god shaped hole”..Oh I love that! amazing way to put it….a poignant reminder that most people who go panning for something wrong in every moment are so hungry for love and acknowledgement…it feels so good to give someone the validation they are thirsty for and to look beyond the outer shell and behaviors to see the innocence within….Your husband hugging that women reminds me of that …if we look we can really see someone…Knowing how good it feels to love it is hard to fathom how those that hate on others via social networking can feel good at night when they rest their head on their pillows…what of the sameness we all share in this human experience?…(sigh)

    Your story of the group coming to your new home reminded me of an experience I had : When I was injured awhile back I went to a religious healing group….how it went: They sit you in front of a movie about Jesus dying on the cross for your sins and in that moment you were healed, and some other scripture stiff, you then go into a room and people lay there hands on you and pray you accept the premise , you accept the bible word for word and you can be spontaneously healed or heal in a few sessions

    ..I knew right away this wouldn’t work for me because I could not fully accept the things in the video …(i could not imaging myself washed in the blood of Christ….a violent negative image..why the blood? why not Light the Spirit…the Christ Consciousness??)…I love Jesus, I believe he taught Love not fear …its the beastly human stuff added to the story and teachings that makes me feel like a refugee of the church

    Anyway, after you watched the video you go into a room with three people in it, they speak with you , then lay their hands on you …I walked in, right away the two people to my left (a man and women) were beaming with love. it was clear their religious practice had led them to Love despite the dogma. There was a women to the right dressed in all black ,stern, cold, and absolutely no warmth or love coming from her….but a sense of panning…panning for evil? satan? Fanatically fueled by Fear the fear of god resulting in a “god shaped hole”…nothing will turn someone to stone quicker than a fear of ones God..not a good foundation for a healthy relationship…I spoke of my spirituality the feminine coming out but the two filled with love seemed to accept it without judgement I remember David the gentlemen even said I have such a childlike love for God which was so sweet and true!! at the same time they heard me address a feminine and male aspect to God as I was speaking….this was like a faint flat note in a song for them…despite it not quite going along with their beliefs completely they heard the LOVE and did not judge…well not our straight lipped, stone-cold friend in the corner

    I spoke of how I wished to heal others and take a light workers class for healthcare physicians…the negative women to my right said…I was in a cult to once before I came here and said the devil is out there and I should be careful…she looked at me like I was the devil… ..hmm..I silently thought (I don’t believe in the devil lady but your seeming very sinister yourself)….

    Anyway the time came for them to put their hands on me. I felt a warmth coming from the two on my left.they so badly wanted my suffering to be released…it was amazing the warmth emanating from them……

    but the women behind me on my right would not place her hands on me (I think i scared her with what I said ) she shook as if repulsed… well after it was all over the left side of my back/shoulder,arm, where the two loving individuals had rested their hands was warm, the wretched pain that was their was gone…where this other women had hovered her hands over , which had no pain previously , felt as if daggers were placed right there …she had transferred all her negativity, her judgement, her fear and yuckyness into the soft tissue of my body was such a profound lesson in that moment I will never forget…an opportunity to look at how we effect each-other ,,,,and to certainly “take care of your Sh*%” as you wrote 🙂 ….or you could cause so much damage. I cant believe with all that negativity she was putting her hands on people…..I healed from that damage she had done with her Fear & Judgment….but has she? I really hope so…♥

    Sorry this was so long!! I LOVE YOUR weekly blog/vlogs

    THANk YOU Colette…this blog and vlog has made me think of this important lesson and the Dragon duel card…love/fear…today (and tomorrow) I will be affirming ,,,,,Choose Love–amber m.

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      awesome thanx for sharing – not too long just perfect for us all to read ;))

  • Renee Sugar

    Feeling at a loss for words, but I went out in a windstorm so I could read the blog
    at the neighbourhood library computer as I have no computer at home. YES it is
    true. No television either. It is becoming more clear to me that real communcation
    sometimes doesn’t need words. Being “present” is a very powerful healing gift
    that can impact others in very profound ways. Insulting, or criticizing someone
    online is a cowardly way to voice an opinion, not to mention childish. It speaks of
    the mentality of the person who posts demeaning insults in a form that is open
    for others to read. The best thing to do; is not react and not respond, and that
    will deflect the barb. I always loved Eleanor Roosevelts’ comment; ” No one can
    make you feel inferior without your consent”. As we are all a part of the web;
    “Man did not weave the web of life; he is merely one strand in it. Whatever we
    do to the web; we do to ourselves.” Chief Seattle.
    That is all for now. I send love and blessings to you and those closest to your heart for a healthy joyful Thanksgiving.
    I am grateful to be a part of this tribe; and the larger story that connects all of us. It wouldn’t have felt right
    to not share. XOXO

  • Elisabeth Ohlsson


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