Promise Me You’ll Never Change!

Updated: July 12, 2015

Dearest You,

Last night I watched the sweetest movie called Hector’s Search for Happiness about an unhappy psychiatrist living a predictable ordered life who, after an epiphany takes a wild impromptu journey to China, Africa and America to find out the secret to happiness with harrowing and hilarious results. ( in a nutshell, although that was a lot for one sentence)

Now, without giving too much away, there was one informative scene when he is in bed with his girlfriend who blurts out before sleep this charged statement “Promise me you’ll never change” which really got me thinking. Hmm.

But I get it. I have wanted to capture happy moments in my life and keep them in a jar. I have craved certainty from my relationships and resisted them when it was obvious we were growing apart. I have experienced the numbing effects of denial about the inevitable like when my mom got cancer, the disintegration of relationship with an old and dear friend, the lifestyle that couldn’t sustain me. I wanted to cling to the best of them and insist they would never change. Of course, that doesn’t work.

I decided to choose an oracle card to give me deeper insight to today’s subject. I chose from The Wisdom of the House of Night oracle cards, felt drawn to one, turned it over and lo and behold The High Priestess of Water showed up with a message of the necessity of surrendering to change for wisdom, growth and happiness. (I love my oracle cards!)

I’ve had to learn most of my hardest lessons through letting go, and my greatest freedoms have been won in radical acceptance and surrender to change. My best creative work has been in response to those changes and to the understanding that life must remain fluid. I’ve never been good with conformity, nor predictability. I am too restless and rebellious. Today I question everything to stay awake. Today I know I’m happy because of my understanding of change and how important it is to experience every aspect of life, every emotion, and to allow my husband to change and grow and be who he needs to be.

We never promised the other we’d never change.

We committed to each other’s personal growth and need for creative expression and within that lies our certainty, which is why we’re happy together. (That, and of course because we’re madly in love.) We have a simple life, simple marriage, simple needs but we’re always on an adventure of discovery.

If you look back on your life, what has remained exactly the same?

I wonder too, if you’ve been in situations where you felt like your life was on automatic? What did that feel like and how did you break out of it? Or, perhaps you fell in love and wanted that person to stay the same, the intimate moments preserved forever in amber? How did you handle it when things changed and what did you learn?

What makes you feel alive?

What makes you happy?

I think about these things as I’m coming up to a birthday this week. No way around it I am past middle age. I can’t tell my skin “Promise me you’ll never change” no matter how many creams or potions that the sexy young thing at the beauty counter sells me- it ain’t gonna happen. For the most part I’ve made peace with this new era of life. I like how I look, lines and all, I love being this age, letting go the expectations of preservation, and just being all I can, choosing what makes my heart sing and not worrying about the inevitable. I want to make every moment count but I know the best ones are like those fireflies that come out at dusk to jump around my backyard recently. They remain but fleeting moments of ecstasy that tease even the memory. I think I’m just going to enjoy them.

Join the conversation and leave me a comment my sparkly tribal dancers. I send you so much love.

love colette 200x103



Showing 93 comments
  • Sue

    Fear has always been my downfall! I feel I am an introvert in an extraverts body, weaving my way through life pretending.
    Over the last few weeks the oracle cards are guiding me in a wonderful direction. I know change can happen if I let go of the past and just be now!!!
    Phew! feels weird to put these sentences out there and know others will read this? 1 fear done!!!!

    • Love

      Yes , iam related to this , I’m couldn’t undo the things I’ve lost in my life but rather move forward and keep struggling in each new day and embrace the tomorrow

    • nadia saretta

      Happy Birthday Collette! I’ve had several changes over the last few years in friendships with women I was really close to, women I really cared about. Other friendships around me seem to be dying off, I wish it wasn’t this way but it’s just the way it is, I can’t control the changes and must accept that seasons change in life. In the midst of all this change I’ve been working towards my life purpose, and that is to be an energy healer. I feel good about this and enjoy being able to help people clear long held stresses in their bodies which opens up a space for them to bring something better into their life. I’ve chosen 2 cards from the Wisdom of Avalon Oracle Cards – The Merlin – Alchemy, justice and balance and The Frog – cleaning house, releasing emotional baggage. I love the guidance and all your posts. Love and blessings to you. x

    • Darlene

      Thank you Colette, for all the wisdom you have shared in your books and oracle cards. no matter where I am in life those cards always send me the right message at the right time . I lost my husband of 25 years a while back and the shock of it set me back…. I realized I was trying to hold onto him by holding onto the past , and that was not on my “map” . I have learned to live in the ” now ” and let the universe point me where I need to go . So much easier to trust and ” go with the flow ” than to agonize over the past and ask why …. I have learned to accept my journey here and keep moving forward on this wonderful path called life . I thank you again for all your wisdom and have a wonderful birthday !!

      • Colette Baron-Reid

        beautiful wisdom

        • LANA

          Thanks for your comment Darlene, it really made me see what I needed to see about holding onto the past and living in the now :))))

          And of course, Colette, for this article that I only got around to reading now!

          Love xo

    • Joan

      I can totally relate to what Colette wrote in my life today. Plus what all of you have written.

      Even the words – I am an introvert in an extroverts body/persona.

      Trying to move forward each day and almost each moment. Step by step.

      Happy Birthday Colette. The day I met you a few years ago was a magical gift to me.

    • Ginny Lott

      My Dear Collette,
      Happy Birthday! I look forward to your emails each day. Your topic of change is the one that hit me hard. Yesterday, I also, drew the High Priestess of Water. I have drawn this card twice this week. I only do the one card draw as it simpler for me to understand. I find the topic is all about change—in a positive way. I can see what is on the way. I don’t mind change…but I like to somehow control how change happens to me. Things ARE changing and I find that I do not have the control I so feel comfortable with. It is a little daunting. I am trying to just let things be, but am not sure how well I am doing this. I am all about not rocking the boat/living INSIDE the box! I will try to move slowly, thanking God for all the wonderful opportunities that are coming my way.
      Thank you for your gift, the wonderful insight you possess.


  • Sherrie

    Well the old friendship dissolved before May but it took me awhile to catch on…..and my 17 yr old cat crossed the bridge that same month. (I adopted her when she was around 8) And yes,being close to your age,I totally get the accepting being past middle age and that I’ll “never look 21 again”. And I’ve been letting go of people lately and am awaiting the new ones who are truly my tribe to appear. I’ll be adopting another cat or two in time,right now just allowing a respectful space to exist in between cats. In the meantime I’m doing what I can to get my ukulele/mandolin teaching going online and boost my online biz as well!

  • Janet Dix

    I couldn’t agree with you more! This week I’m reliving my childhood and heading to Cedar Point for the day!! Front seat, first car!!! Age is just a number…I always tell people my age, they say you don’t look or act 51… I say what does 51 look like? How does 51 act? Like ME!!!!!
    I’ve been on vacation this past week and riding my Harley is my passion…you know that feeling…I put on a perma-smile and ride…. ?
    HaPpY bIrThDaY Colette!
    Have cake!!! ???

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      sounds like so much fun !! I am turning 57 and itching to jump on my Harley too!

    • Diana Boles

      I grew up across the state line north—lots of memories of trips to Cedar Point —at 66 I can testify to many changes at the amusement park—-s of life!

  • Cassandra

    I’m glad you chose that deck. I’ve never really read the books, but it’s my favorite. I keep pulling the “Oath” card. I’m not sure how to interpret it, I think I’m missing the point and it shows up again and again…and again. Keep using Wisdom of the Night every once in awhile so I can figure it out! hehe, love.

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      Oath is about a promise and commitment. My question to you is therefore what path are you committed to? Have you allowed yourself to conform out of the need to belong or a feeling of safety? What kind of contracts did you make with people and paths? .. its a good start. Remember oracles are also meant to lead you to ask deeper questions of yourself so you can manifest your best life oxoxox

      • Cassandra

        Thank you! Definitely something for me to think about. Gosh, it’s been haunting me. 🙂

  • Nancy

    First of all I would like to wish you a Very Happy Birthday Colette! I am also a July Baby and this year I will turn the big 60! I have always had the attitude that the older I get the wiser I become! The feeling that I have much to teach the younger generation! The last two months I have tried to embrace the changes that have happened in my life! My younger brother lost his battle with cancer and left to start his New Journey! For two and a half years I clung to the faith that he would win the fight! In the last months that he lived I new change was inevitable and embraced every moment I had with him while he was here. I now look for him in the beauty of nature and see him as a part of it. I know when I am thinking of him he is thinking of me! Sometimes change is difficult but I try to embrace each one with Love and compassion! Thank you Colette???

  • Rosslyn, ( as old as I envision,( crono 66yr))

    Colette, you are looking more energized and Alive recently…
    & love the new hair style!
    Happy Birthday homebody, & yes, “Life is a Highway”.

  • David

    Wow! I’m Right on the cusp of cancer and Leo- and have had an enormous amount of trials, trouble and Fear with changes in my life-.. eg. Losing my parents and a divorce. A Change of state and Living conditions etc. This has Left me -mm? – Somewhat Paralyzed.
    Trying to work through this somehow ! – And to think I was a former guitarist / singer who entertained l00’s. who would of Thought change would have shut me down like this?

  • Janice

    Turned 50 last year and experienced some tumultuous yet growth inducing events and emotions. In May, my job (that I was considering leaving) left me. In June…said goodbye to a family vacation home and Farewell to a canine furbaby:( Decided to take a sabbatical style break and enjoy sweet summer and practice being content and grateful with what is. Started a crosstitch project and in a few weeks I’m going to my first Reiki class with horses being a part of the program:) Today, from the Wisdom of Avalon deck I pulled the sequence of Joy…Movement…Letting Go!!
    I appreciate your down to earth insightful words, gracious sharing and wisdom. Trusting Spirit for guidance to connect with my soul’s joy and embrace this beautiful gift called life. Namaste and Happy Birthday!!

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      thanx for sharing Janice this sounds like a beautiful new chapter for you :0

  • Teresa

    Happy birthday!! I firmly believe that age is just a number and while I can’t stop the getting older, I refuse to age! It feels like you’re making a similar choice. I have resisted change with the best of them, but my greatest periods of growth have occurred when I was finally able to take a step outside the box and take a chance. I love your reminder that “what is yours won’t go past you.” That feels so true! Thank you for your oracle cards! I love them, too!

  • Teresa Mooney

    Happy Birthday my Cancer friend!?????? What you said hit home with me. I turned 60 in March, my husband turned 55. I tried not to let it bother me but I realized at my age a lot happens to a person that is not always good. Both my parents just passed, which takes a chunk out, and you reflect on everything in your life. My two children are adults now so it is just Ryan and I when we have always centered our life around the children and our grandchildren, and now we have to Learn how to have a new life with just us and be happy and have fun. Luckily I too have a great husband. So we are opening ourselves up to new experiences. We are trying new things and are taking our first cruise and hope to travel a lot. This has been some hard years for us and we have been stuck, but we are determined to pull out of it and progress! Today is the first day of the rest of your life, I always liked that saying! ???????

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      isn’t it great though, our husbands will always be younger than us 😉 And life is all about new beginnings and adventures even within the endings and losses are seeds of renewal. xoxoxox

  • kirstin


  • Shelley

    Dear Colette
    First of all, I want to wish you an advance Happy Birthday- your birthday is the same date as my husband’s- and mine is today, July 12. I turned 60 today. Yay July babies! ( my daughter is also July -she is a Leo.
    I am dealing with some letting go – my son is separating from his wife, with whom I have a strong and caring relationship. I am working on letting go of the way I imagined things would be and coming to terms with how they actually are… This involves acceptance and trust that love is never lost, only transformed. It’s a process!
    I do feel very blessed with loving family and friends and I am embracing the new freedoms which will come with this new •age 60 * decade. I hope I will change and grow as long as I live!!
    All the very best, much love ?

  • Rachel Medhurst

    I feel like I’ve been on autopilot for my whole twenties. I turned 30 this year. The funny thing is I forget how much I have done. I’m a full time indie author, so I’m doing what I love.

    However, the place I struggle is in my love life. It took me a really long time to let go of someone, even when they were no good for me. I stayed in the same mindset for many years. Although, he helped me to open up and really see what I was doing and who I was. So I changed. Luckily, I was finally forced to let go. I feel so open and surrendered to change. I’m ready to embrace it!

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      you have so much to look forward to dear Rachel.. enjoy every moment xxooxox, and remember this – every relationship is meant to give u a gift. Just think how much great content you have now to write about!

  • Karen

    Just love – “letting go the expectations of preservation” 😀 I look in the mirror and think, Hey I don’t look too bad ……. then I put my glasses on ….. oh dear ! Anyway I’m turning 57 this July too so Happy Birthday to us both xx

  • christine

    Happy Birthday Colette! Blessings for a wonderful year!

  • Paul

    I have seen that movie. I really enjoyed it. You can’t purue happiness, you can only be it. Life is change itself – it will force itself on you despite your resistance. I am in the midst of what I know is major change, something is about to happen, actually must happen for me. I won’t even bother to describe my circumstances, it is insanely stressful, yet I know that God will, actually has, provided for me and I will be more than ok, much more and I will look back with gratitude that I can enjoy the good times that much more having experienced the opposite and emerged victorious – how’s that for optimism. It is hard to embrace change sometimes, a lot of the time, but it is going to happen so you might as well embrace it.

  • Lisa Claudia Briggs

    Happy birthday beautiful girl….I love your decks… powerful/mystical/gorgeous.
    Am finally learning to fall in love with change and let the tides take me. This move to the ocean has
    been powerful and there is so much to remind me of fluid/flow/surrendering but in the best ways.
    Was in the ocean yesterday and 8 white geese flew over me, but they were almost like a mirage.
    The totem was perfect for right now…quests, and writing, and the 8 of infinity.
    Anyways- thank you for your always astute perspectives and teachings xo

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      So happy your move is bringing you a new life and new magic. Looking forward to reading your new work! oxoxoxo

  • Barbara

    Have an absolutely wonderful birthday. May it be filled with love, laughter and the joy of being alive. I passed the century mark awhile back and there are times my misspent youth and motorcycles come back to haunt me. But I tell folks that the lines on my face are the road maps to my life. Each has a tale of laughter or sorrow but they all were an integral part of my life that I wouldn’t change.

  • serena

    this doesn’t need to be posted I just wantd to compliment you on how great you look. Aside from your haircut really suiting you, you look so bright in the video for the universal energies for the week. Loving your age, choosing what makes your heart sing… it shows and looks great on you. p.s. thanks for all your great work.

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      thank you so much!!! BIG HUG ( I don’t know how to answer you without it posting lolol)

  • Emma

    I totally agree. I am learning that my old mental ways of trying to change things, which usually involved ‘beating myself up’, just never has and never will work & doing it creates sickness for me.

    So also, I am deciding to let go of ‘my plans’ and let what wants to happen happen. It takes the pressure off me to ‘make it happen’ (which never works effectively either).

  • Jenn

    Happy Birthday!!
    I have always been very open to change physically speaking….moving to a new house or town or even state, the growth and changes of my children who are now 19 and 22. I have been divorced now for nearly 3 years after being married for 21 years and I have even learned to embrace that change of being on my own now (even though I was on my own for much of the marriage, but having someone even just physically there is sometimes more comforting or safe feeling). And in the past few years I have worked on changing and bettering myself (and in many areas of my life I have really grown and changed and become even stronger), but I have noticed lately that even though I know in my heart there are still things I need to let go of to continue to grow there is still terrible little voice in my head that says: “Stay with that fear and don’t ever change”. But I know in time I will welcome all change with open arms. Life is a journey!

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      you’re not alone.. all of us go through bouts of that- I sure do, but that is the daily task for us all- to remember that Spirit is first, and courage to trust brings us ever into a new adventure. It’s only when we temporarily fall asleep, forget our soul and see through the lens of the small self. xoxoxox Life is a Highway and we’re all riding on it!

  • Kristi

    Happy Birthday Colette,
    Thank you for all you do and sharing your cards with us every week. Definitely helps me with how I view things and helps me to stop and rethink all the time. Love you.

  • Ronney

    Dear “dear” Colette,
    About a month ago, my daughter sent me an email about you and said, “Mom, you have to check this fabulous lady out”. She didn’t know I’ve known about you for years! And her message was right on, because I would like to deepen my experience with you and meet you and see how we can work together – more about the why’s and how’s later.
    In the moment I would like to say how much I enjoy your delivery! You are filled with wisdom, joy, laughter and fun! (not to mention talent!!!)
    I published a magazine, “Inner Words” for 13 years and hosted many people in workshops, and seminars. And I would love to share your work. Please send me email and we can set up a time to chat or communicate by email.
    Love your writing and your videos – excellent!!

    Many Blessings for who you are and what you bring into the Universe!!!
    Big Hugs,

  • Dawn

    Happy Birthday Colette!

  • Julie

    A big year for change! I turned 56, shifted into new home, my Mother transitioned 4 weeks ago and I am considering becoming a professional tarot reader by the end of this year. I am still coming to grips with this body aging with its attendant aches and pains – not to mention grey hair! And yes, coming to grips with changing relationships. Children as they become independent adults, husband as he contemplates the next stage of his life and changing relationship with what was once a dear friend that appears to getting close to a ‘natural parting of ways’ due to changing values and priorities for both parties.
    I am nervous, excited, sad, and exhausted all at the same time! It is an amazing and scarey age – this ‘middle age’. Tis neither here nor there? It is a time of becoming and I am trying to embrace it!

  • Yolanda

    Hi Colette, sending you love and joy on your b-day and all the days after that. Changes has always been hard on me, but over the years I can’t seem to stay in one place too long and move to a new location ( house, apt, condo). Each time I’ve embraced new lessons. I am now 57 years old and continue working on becoming better each day (I take two steps forward, one step back), is better than what it used to be. I feel grateful for the peace and love I feel, but there still resentment and sadness when I think of the past, so I am working of getting rid negativity in my life (which is not always easy, when family members are involved). So, I am working on acceptance and love people for who they are (easier say than done). One day at a time…..blessings

  • Diana Boles

    Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes–Stand and Face the Change! Ch-ch-ch-changes – Look out you Rock and Rollers! Time may change me—-but I can’t change time!

    Above, Janet Dix mentions an amusement park in Sandusky, Ohio—Cedar Point. It has been around forever! My Grandmother was born in 1896 and lived to be 102—and she went to that amusement park by boat from Detroit in the 1920’s. What if that place had never changed? What would’ve happened to the wooden roller coaster? What would’ve happened to the riders on that old structure?

    Change is the maintenance of all life. We start as infants, where everything must be done for us or to us. Then we change by beginning to do for ourselves and the amusement park of life provides us with rides of joy, challenge, fear, sadness, courage, strength, resilience, fortitude, solitude, attachment and letting go! Just like that first drop on the coaster—butterflies in the belly and heart in the throat and scream from parted lips! It is the every day normal, and every day is a NEW NORMAL!

    Just ask my grandmother. She had lived in 3 centuries! (3months shy of this fact). She went from a pot bellied stove to central air! A letter that took 2 weeks to get across the country to instant messaging! From streets with horses to Concord Jets—from from simply hard to simply complicated—but what remained the same through of her life? Change — and she was as beautiful at 102 as she was at age 2—-and she turned 100 the same year her daughter turned 70—-she turned to my Mom and said “Flo! 30 years between us doesn’t feel like such a big deal anymore, does it!?” I bet the generation gap punches a hole in every generation! And then we learn how to crochet and turn it into lace and make it a bigger table cloth.

    July 17—-Happy Birthday little sister! I just hit 66 and I know there ain’t no big difference in 9 yrs!

  • Barb Parcells

    We share a birthday month! Mine is in two weeks. The biggest changes in my life, the ones that came out of no where and threw me for a loop have been the ones that have resulted in my greatest growth. Even though they were painful at the time, everyone has to go through growing pains to become who they were meant to be. I like myself so much more and accept myself, flaws, wrinkles and all, as the BFF I truly am.

  • Marlee

    Happiest Birthday Colette 😉 CELEBRATE Beautiful Magnificent YOU ! Have been in such a state of fear and then exhilarating hope and then back to fear … needed to read this to have assurance that I am right where I am supposed to be on this journey. My painful childhood past so full of fear is trying desperately to hang onto the present moment but it knows its time is up because I have been moving toward and celebrating living in the present moment BE HERE NOW and I have forgiven my past — brought healing love to it — and I now realize God’s plan for it all — I am to heal others with my story ! God is taking my mess and turning it into my message — and that makes me smile BIG ! Acceptance and perfect self expression == FREEDOM LOVE IT xxoo

  • Mary Louise

    Happy Birthday, Colette! I love your oracle cards, too. I am so grateful, you created them. They give me guidance, and show me what I am not seeing.
    I read your post, and It spoke to my heart. Every word said how I feel. Letting go is a heart break. Tearing up and blessing everything as I write this, feels good. A release that has been long in coming. Today is a day, Love guides my life. One step at a time. The Divine mentors me. How great is that!
    Love you. Thank you always.

  • Lynn

    I am 56 and this message about living fearlessly and genuinely has been in my face the last few days. Next month I am getting on a plane by myself to fly to California and meet with a gaggle of amazing online friends who I have never met. We got this!

  • Brook

    Ah! The synchronicity of this post is delicious! My dh needs to be eased into change while I say “yes!” perhaps a bit too quickly. It took him 3 weeks to accept that it was time to haul our 15-year-old couch out in the street for free cycle. Now the room is airier, more capacious, and I feel as if we’ve opened the space for some new blessing to come into our lives. I’m thinking maybe I should give him a pocketful of coins and encourage him to make them clink while saying “Change is good!” xoxo

  • Diane

    Great post, great MM video, and great photo up top, sexy mama! My life is in the midst of change. I’m homeless, loveless, friendless, etc. Huge transition. I’m so glad you’re back to provide me/us with inspiration every week. You are such an important touchstone.
    Much love from another Avalon Sister from way back,

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      hang in there !! keep the faith and keep going . miracles can and do happen when we trust and behave as if we mean it oxoxoxoxox

  • Lori Lee

    Rock on sistah! Just celebrated year 53 in this physical manifestation and (en) joy the letting go and surrendering to the this miraculous stream of Life! Loving every moment! Maybe not so much the ones where my back and knee are not happy campers but they just take a little love to warm up to the occasions. Enjoy riding your two wheels of joy! (Mine come in the form of bicycles and wind in the hair moments) Feeling blessed and grateful to shine! Thank you for sharing your light with us. Happy happy joy joy!!

  • Renee Sugar

    “Tis the season for “re-birth”. Happiest Birthday to you Colette!!!!!
    May the coming year continue be filled with the uncharted and the inspired.
    May those adventures that are intended to expand your perspective and to offer the most growth enhancing doorways to open at the appointed
    moment be delivered according to the “Higher Plan”.

    I too will be celebrating a birthday at the end of this month. 60th!!!!! I marvel at the variety that my life has contained. Everyday is a new opportunity to learn
    something new. I listen, I read, I observe, I attempt something new. I am never bored and in retrospect; I see what a waste of time the years of striving for
    perfection were. The exacting standards that I created were at times unrealistic but it was in the stretching, growing, and yes failing that were most educational lessons. Sometimes only in retrospect can we understand why something did happen, and how it fit into the bigger plan. I love to discover; to open new doors, to meet new people, and to know that not controlling the outcome holds the key to enjoying the process more. Probably a slow learner, or late bloomer; but like a fine wine; or cheese I am “becoming” the best person for my own growth and well-being. As friendships end usually because the other person has ceased to grown/challenge themselves. The only inspiration I can offer is to be an example. I have spent many years learning about human potential , personal growth/For those who have an “attitude” that invites life in whatever form it is delivered become resilient and bounce back after defeats/setbacks. Those who mourn the past and “expect that is should be exactly the way it has always been can become bitter, stuck and miserable. Death is not easy; but parts of us must die in order to make room for the next uncharted adventure.

    I do not believe in I can’t, or I could never do that!!!! I am willing to try. I knock, maybe the door opens maybe not; if yes I enter; see what is there, how it feels; and then decide if I want to stay or explore a new doorway. “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’ courage”. Anais Nin
    The perspective are shifting, and I am cognizant of my mortality and humanity. Wishing everyone who is celebrating their “birth”-day this month a year
    of becoming who you would be excited and proud to meet. We are no longer prisoners of the past unless we choose this. Every moment is the last moment and each one is a “re-birth.
    (P.S.) As I lay down last week to have a nap; late Friday afternoon the telephone rang. Guess who? It was the H.R. contact asking if it was a good time to speak.
    Timing is everything!!! It was interesting because I had let go; I wasn’t rehearsed, it took me by surprise and we had a very relaxed and enjoyable phone meeting. I did take me a while to get relaxed and to let go. Her name was Scarlet. I had a joke to myself; Remember Gone with the Wind? Frankly Scarlet, I don’t give a damn.!!!!

  • Chris

    Happy, Happy Birthday Colette! Thank you for being the bright beacon in this fog called life you be. Funny how the “Teacher arrives when the student is ready”, and after reading all the posts prior to mine, every one is my teacher. Much thanks and love to all:@)

  • Jenny

    Oh how I need this message today. This is one of biggest hurdles. I love change, but grow impatient to understand the significance. I’ve been feel a pull – a calling – nut have no idea where it is leading me and have been asking for that knowing moment. It’s time to let go and allow it to come. Thank you fellow goddess for your unwavering wisdom and humility. Thanks for sharing with us.

  • Jessi

    Happy Birthday Colette!
    I am currently living on “Auto Pilot” I have asked for guidance and I have been given a few answers. I am just hoping that I am taking the correct path..

  • elaine

    Enjoy your birthday Friday, Colette, and many many more … love the new picture of gorgeous you and you look 30 … really !! I think when one loves life and lives it to the fullest — it shows.

    Speaking of aging, I learned a lot from your video interview with Dr. Christiane Northrup on ageless divas, and it has truly changed my life. I constantly think of being 92 and dying falling off a roof because I was so darn active and alive. Like your other tribe member who knows nine years is nuttin’, I am also 66. And, oh, you are one great interviewer; like Oprah, you know how to LISTEN and, of course, ask the right questions.

    And I too love your oracle cards, Enchanted Map, looking forward to their wisdom and guidance as only a curious Sagittarian can. And your book The Map I am starting to read and OMG I need a dictionary with it … you are one smart lady … but I am loving the message so far. I always feel so sorry for people who have no faith in the invisible, but I know Spirit is all around me. And it looks like I may have to do some work on my soul again uh oh lazy daisy that I am, but I will DO IT !!

    Which brings me to a story around my birthday number 65 which I celebrated with my Mom who turned 91 on the same day, November 22 (JFK’s date with destiny.) Two days before my 65th my beloved spiritual teacher/guru, Sylvia Browne, had transitioned to The Other Side to my great sadness. I loved reading her books and it made me sad that there would not be another … I have almost all of what Sylvia wrote.

    Also that year my dearest friend, Barb, went quickly from cancer in the summertime on … JULY 17 !!! I will never forget your birthday now, Colette. I love what the one lady said: when I think of him, I know he is thinking of me. I will remember that now as I think of Barb and Sylvia often and of course all the people and pets that touched my heart in this lifetime.

    Two days after my/my Mom’s birthday, on November 24, I was sleeping in my Mom’s guest bedroom — I was visiting — and awoke as the sun shone through the window and I lay there wondering how I would get back to sleep. Then I heard the most inexplicably beautiful, angelic, otherworldly voice call my name … elaine. The voice seemed to come from near the ceiling, above the armoire.

    My first thought was that my Mom had passed away in the night and her spirit was calling me from The Other Side. I ran to her bedroom and thankfully saw her breathing. It has been 1.5 years since I heard that magnificent voice and I still wonder who and why? This ‘curious cat Sag’ likes her mysteries solved !!

    Is it possible my Mom has a portal in this room as she is on the top floor of the condo building which, by the way, is on church property ??? But angels are around us and don’t need portals or do they? I know the answer will come to me someday when it is time to reveal its purpose. I am not beating myself over it, but I really wish I had stayed in the room and responded to my heavenly voice. But what a blessed gift I was given.

    So I wish for you a gift from Spirit — as precious as I received — for your birthday number 57, dear Colette, and have fun with that handsome hubby of yours !! … blessings today and on ‘your day,’ love, elaine

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      angels have a habit of calling our names at the most wondrous times.. thanx for sharing.. and thanx to everyone else I didn’t get to!

  • Liz

    You know what’s funny? This is happening to me RIGHT NOW!

    I’m young and ready to take on life. I’m in my early 20’s, moved out two years ago with my soon-to-be husband, we just bought a house, ripped up and recreated the backyard in a month, he’s starting a new job next week and now we want to buy a truck. When I told my parents the last bit of news yesterday, they got their panties in a knot! IT’S JUST A TRUCK! It’s an investment towards our business that we’re starting next year and (eventually) will be using it for kids, hockey, work, etc. Make’s sense right? I don’t think we can do landscaping with a tiny Saturn…

    When I got into work last night, all upset about the argument, my boss (a very wise woman) explained that they can’t cope with change. I’m still their little girl, and they still want me to need them. It’s tougher to accept change as you get older. But hey, I’m young, why not take risks?

    After crying my eyes out, my dad (my biggest critic and supporter) finally said “Do what you know is best. Clearly you wouldn’t be so upset if you didn’t think this through.”

    So, in the end, support those you love even if you’re uncomfortable with the change. Clearly the person that is making the change has thought it through.

    I hope you have many wonderful birthday celebrations!!! Happy Birthday!


  • Diane

    We cannot not change – the only thing constant is change. I too watched “Hector’s Search for Happiness” and it took me by surprise. I fell in love with the concept and the pieces of happiness that he found in others along the way. I did a search on the movie and found out that the author of the book has also written three books on Hector. Adding to the already high stack of books. Happiness is about change. One can’t promise not to change for that is impossible. Every moment is about change; how we breathe, see, feel, experience, think, even the body changes from moment to moment. The biggest change within is our awareness for that is what puts into action how we respond to what was to what is now. That is what we see in ourselves and in others – in our relationship with Self and the world. I find joy in the ability to be aware of the needs to change within, to bring it out lovingly, be with that awareness, release any ties to it and then do it all over again. Its our soul’s song and we can dance with it, or ignore it- but not for long. The ebb and flow of change is, I feel, Love’s quiet way of guiding us into more of what we think we are. Happy Birthday Colette – mine is tomorrow. Have a joyful day filled with lots of magic and fairy dust.

  • LaTasha Trimese

    First–happy b’earth day! May your life continue to expand in love, joy, wholeness, abundance, laughter, prosperity and all your souls desires!

    Second, you are beautiful inside and out! This photo at the top is abSOULutely amazing…I see the depth in your eyes and the character of wisdom and freedom in your face. I wish more women past middle age would begin to see themselves as beautiful as they are and share it with the world–because this is what gives us peace in moving into the next phase of life…EXAMPLES!!!

    Third–your words always speak to my soul. I am one that has had challenges with letting go of people and things that no longer serve me–but I am growing and learning to accept it and surrender to the highest good for my life.

    I love your Oracle cards too (I own all decks) and I love your weekly posts–they always resonate deeply.

    Thank you for your work and for sharing so authentically with the world.

    You are appreciated. <3

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      thanks so so much for your share – gives me a reason to keep doing this! oxoxox

  • Kimberly

    Happy Birthday, Colette! I am new to the tribe, a nurse specializing in two areas of great transformation, acute detox/addiction recovery and hospice. Your book on weight loss has been priceless to me, teaching me to care for myself in order to care for my patients with strength and clarity. Thank you for putting it out there for all of us in the trenches!! I appreciate the Wizard of Awareness as I ‘step back’ and learn from my patients. I refer to my hospice patients as “The Great Teachers.” I look forward to every shift, knowing that I have skills to cleanse and nourish myself after the powerful extremes of illness and emotion I work in. I am happy to join you all to spread health, deep healing and waken joy.

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      welcome !!! thanks so much for sharing here- the more the merrier! xoxoxox

  • Irina

    So enjoyable listening to you, Colette. Always new and inspiring, and young! THE HAPPIEST EVER BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!

  • Chris Tuck

    Happy Birthday Colette!! always love all your insights and blogs! I can’t wait to watch this movie too and gather some insights. As life flows along, I am learning more and more to Trust and let things flow and know that it will be alright. Every year I get closer to my guides and looking for the next adventure and directions. I am not saying it is always easy, especially during these times of financial challenges! This be in observe mode and not “in it” is truely what is called for me in the past 2 weeks and the do nothing for this week as far as making big life changes (employment) tells me I am right where I am supposed to be for now. Love and lots of Blessings! Hoping you do another retreat in MA for 2016 and Canada does not put you too far away to do that. 🙂

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      I am coming to Kriplu in january again .. every year we will do this ! first weekend of January

  • Lois

    I love your weekly readings Colette, they always remind me of important truths and to stay centered, thank you!
    Also, Happy Birthday to you, fellow Cancerian, and enjoy your day.
    Big love and hugs,

  • Mae

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLETTE! My daughter’s birthday is this week also. She will be turning 26, my babygirl! I have celebrated my 60th. in May. One thing that does not change in my life is my love for my two kids and my two grandkids. I am ready to embrace the changes that i know will come about in my next journey in my life. I trust in my spirit guides . I am Happy. God Bless Colette.

  • Shawna

    Loved this timely message…thank you! Funny as the last several days have been bringing me more opportunities to ‘let go’. When you think you have it seems it comes up again…and there’s more. A never ending process….an onion with an infinity of layers it seems!!! So my relatively new kitty has been teaching me these lessons. First I had to let go to be ok and trusting with her doing her own thing outdoors. Now it’s letting go again for she’s decided she doesn’t want to come inside for the evenings. A rule I thought I’d put in place because other ‘responsible’ cat people do that…and for her safety..and night time is often the only time we are actually together. I figured we’d grow closer. Now I am questioning the whole concept of boundaries. Boundaries are rather ridiculous for a cat as many of you may have experienced. I can certainly try…I do everything I can to ensure she is safe, very well cared for, and most importantly completely loved. But they do what they want to do. And I have one with a lot of wild instincts…she’s not the kind that wants to be picked up, or do anything against her will. Even the lure of special tuna treats was not strong enough to get her inside…she flat out refused. I shed so many tears…felt so heartbroken. Expected us to have this great love affair and bond that will last many long years. This isn’t what I signed up for…what is happening. Yet, I look at her and my heart heart knows we are meant for each other as it did when I said ‘yes’ to taking her in my own. And so, here I am, realizing I need to let go…what other option do I really have. And a small part of me suspects that in the letting go, that closeness will actually grow…what’s meant to be will be there, I don’t have to force it or have it come about a certain way. I don’t need to ensure she’s locked inside at night against her will to have that fact it may be hindering it. But then I wonder…am I just a push over, what about what I want..what about’s the only 1 thing I ask of her…everything else she has her way. So, I asked the Wisdom of the Hidden Realms….whoa, I got “The Metal King”. There’s the Boundaries. hmmm. And yet when I read the card more I see how it can be more applied to me personally…my own sense of fulfillment and self esteem my own personal boundaries..not necessarily in this case boundaries I impose on another. At least I think. Interesting stuff….I’ll have to ponder this some more. In the meantime my Lily is happy and healthy and loved. I can let go and trust in that. And wait patiently for our bond to grow as she gets older and wiser (she’s still a youngster after all!) 🙂

  • Paula

    Happy, Happy Birthday, Colette!!! I agree, with age comes wisdom and the understanding of what is truly important!!!

    I have always had a difficult time embracing change and now I find myself soon to be 59, laid off and with my 87 year old mother in the hospital.

    I know in my heart it is all as it should be and I too am doing my best to feel to heal the fear and to TRUST NOW.

    I’m starting my own virtual personal assistant business; really stepping out of my box but I want to be of service and not to Corporate America.

    It helped me to read your article to be reminded that change is inevitable and promotes further growth and learning!!!

    Thank you and I hope you have a new year filled with health, lots of fun and continued blessings!!!

  • Alecia

    Happy Birthday Collette!!
    That movie was great! In the prison with the whistle, OMG!!

  • Lori

    Happy Birthday to you! Just so you know you look absolutely marvelous darling!! You really do. I love you and your Hay House Radio Show so thank you for giving so freely your gift and your encouragement. When I see that your on I get happy and anxious to listen just so I can get some good flowing energy because right now life aint so grand and I keep on waiting and hoping and doing… just incase my turn comes around and spirit helps to make some happiness flow through me. You are a grand sunshine in my life.

    Much love and tons of health and prosperity to you and yours! (oh and the fur souls in your household too)

  • Trace

    Happy birthday to you Colette, and this was a very timely Birthday present for me on today the 14th, down here in Oz. Love reading your blog and I will be practicing accepting change.

  • Roweana

    I don’t like change but I welcome it and soon find I am proud of myself for changing. I was working well toward the future but struck a couple of hurdles which tested me, at first I thought they were good changes but then I went back to analysing them. Now I doubt myself again and my weight has exploded, I am now trying to piece my way back onto my path of excitement but it feels like I am going snails pace. I know I will get there and there is a lesson for me in this but it’s always hard to see at the time. I tell people about letting go and I try to take my own advise but this is a very challenging thing for me when I like structure.

  • Mary

    Happy Birthday Colette!
    Change has always been scary for me, so this is a good topic for me to contemplate. What’s been helping me a lot lately is to live in the moment as much as I possibly can, to take life one day at a time, and to appreciate all that I have been blessed with.
    Someone once told me that the only thing in this world that remains constant is change!
    I thank all of you and Colette for your wise advise.

  • helen

    oooh love your picture – all tanned and wild hair and simply gorgeous! so party on this week darling
    … ahem… ah past middle age? wait, you haven’t even gotten to middle age – that is in three more years! you counted wrong!
    the fun begins at 60 – you’re just getting warmed up ~ blessings and wonderful times for the coming year to you xoxo 🙂 helen

  • Lisa

    Thank you, Colette, and Happy Birthday, too! Great month to have a birthday btw. 🙂
    I understand that line from the movie and am SO glad my internal curiosity/ compasses forces me to change–whew!! How much less rich my life would be without changing–albeit more comfortable at times. . .

  • DLLGRJandfurballs

    Happy Day! Colette
    LOV : )

    I am visiting my grandson and daughter. I have to use the library for e-mails. I was turning the corner near her home and the library so this beautiful little blue-ish dragon-fly turned the corner with me (for about 13 seconds I drove slow and it worked hard at flapping along) at my Honda’s window level …. LOL immediately I thought of you and your visions (philosophy), LOL. Fun with natures signals.

    Birth Blessings
    Regards to family, friends, staff, and tribe,
    More Power to Us, Amen …
    Adding Light to All Lights
    World, National, and Local Peace

  • Jean

    Happy birthday colette

  • Eric


    I guess you can tell I’ve been going through some thing based on my post last week. When you have your faith tested it can be very daunting. My thoughts started to snowball internally and I began to question everything about myself (midlife crisis?) Based on what I learned from you and the rest of the tribe I used those tools to put the brakes on this mental free-fall: meditation, music, and writing. These techniques DO work and I’m glad I have them.

    Happy Birthday Colette! I hope you have plans (or maybe plans have been made for you) to celebrate. As we annually celebrate the anniversary of our births it can be a double-edged sword for some people. As the count on those anniversaries increase some people will dread each coming of that day. They seem to be looking back at time lost and the blissful ignorance of youth. With age comes knowledge and hopefully wisdom but the bumps and bruises we endure to get that knowledge and wisdom can be painful; they affect how we address similar situations where we received those bumps and bruises learned those life lessons. If we passed the test and learned the lesson then there is no way we can fail if tested again, but even still we hesitate. It is these times where we need to learn to let go. It can be very scary to let go, especially in situations where we have no control. When I was young my mom took me to swimming lessons with me and my sisters. It was one of the most traumatizing of my young life! I would cling to the instructor for dear life as we when into deep water; there was no bottom! If I couldn’t feel the bottom of the pool it was sheer terror! As I screamed bloody murder embarrassing my mom and the more I fought the water the faster I sank. It was a few years before I got in the deep end of the pool but as I got into my teens I took Red Cross courses on my way to a lifeguard certification. It was then when I “let go”; I stopped fighting the water and found out that I could float; eventually I learned to tread water and began to enjoy swimming. In this situation the water was the nemesis I was fighting but I didn’t have to. Once I let go the water became my ally.

    We all want to be validated; most of the issues we have with ourselves stems from wanting to be validated by others. Lately there has been a push to do everything “by yourself”. There was a time when neighbors talked to each other and looked out for each other; some still do but not as before. There was a time when milk was delivered to your door; you could get your paper delivered by your neighbor’s kid, and families sat around the dinner table. On the occasion that you did go out for fast food the servers were courteous and the restaurant was clean. The service station was full serve and you knew all of your attendants. Slowly we began to lose our sense of service; we began to have to pump our own gas, we had to get our own drinks and bus our own tables at the fast food restaurants. Milk stopped being delivered, you had to go to the store for a paper, and families stopped sitting around the dinner table together. Neighbors stopped talking to each other and became suspicious of each other. In the past 15 years people have stopped shopping at malls and get more things online. We have isolated ourselves from one another; our social skills have atrophied. Hell, nowadays we even take our own photos instead of asking someone to assist in the process 😛 Show me a “self-made” person and I’ll show you someone out of touch with reality. No one has ever done anything by themselves! If you think about your everyday life there is nothing you do where you haven’t had input from someone else. Only when we acknowledge that we can’t do it by ourselves and ask for help is when we will live our lives more enjoyably. We need to let go and only then we’ll find the answers that we seek. When I was in that pool I felt alone, especially when the swimming instructor left me in the deep end of the pool. It was only when I learned to stop fighting the water that I found the answer of being in harmony with the water. I don’t know what my next exercise will be to remind me to let go (skydiving?) It’s like that exercise that we did in summer camp or a team building exercise: you stand on a box or platform and fall backwards and trust that your teammates will catch you. It was a physical exercise but in a mental capacity we need to do the same. Just by writing in this forum and being able to candidly express ourselves is the mental equivalent of that “trust exercise”. We don’t have to do everything by ourselves; we have to trust in Spirit and each other to find our way through this maze called life.

    What makes me happy? Writing makes me happy, if you couldn’t guess 😉 I can also say that I like to read, listen to music, cheer for my favorite team but the thing that really floats my boat is when someone else can benefit from my skills or knowledge no matter how large or small. That is the validation I seek. The funny thing is you don’t know who is looking at you and what knowledge of yours they may benefit from. I wish I could do more for you for your birthday: a cake, funny hats and yelling “surprise”. The only thing I can offer to you is a thank you for something you gave to me. It’s something that I’ve made my personal mantra. I’ve made it my screen saver on my computer and I offer it to you and all of the Cancers of the tribe celebrating a birthday. Happy Birthday Colette! Always remember:

    “What is for you won’t go past you” – CBR

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      thanx for sharing dear Eric – funny I had the exact experience learning to swim I was so so afraid and I even kicked the instructor in the nose hahahahah. I am going to spend a quiet day this Friday giving thanks and celebrating by cleaning out my closets and giving away a bunch of stuff to women in need. Then hubby is going to take me somewhere special 😉 I love that I am a year wiser and am that much more determined to grab life by the handles and sing Life is a Highway at the top of my lungs with gratitude and joy. I don’t fight the water anymore and am like a little fish now.. happy to go with the flow and splash around. xoxoxo

  • Ruth Ingraham

    Dear Colette, Happy Birthday! I just love you! Of course, I am a Scorpio! Thank you for your helpful hints like staying curious, saying “that’s interesting”, and getting on my bird! These things help me all the time to step outside of my anxiety and get better perspective so I don’t make myself crazy. I just want you to know how valuable your newsletter and readings and oracle cards are to me! Thank you so much for doing what you do! You inspire me regularly to not give up on my dreams, even if what is happening at the moment isn’t my ideal or happening “fast enough”. I really appreciate your reminders that what is for me will not go past me! Thank you again and I hope your birthday is magical!

  • Alexandra

    Dear Colette,

    first of all:

    I hope that you have the best day ever with lots of love, joy and a big party with your beloved people around you.

    Thanks for your post! I have read three “Hector-books” of Francois Lelord, but didn’t know that they already made a movie out of the first one… I really can imagine that the movie is sweet (already had a look at the cast 🙂 ), cause the books were delightful. 🙂

    In my opinion, the plea “Promise me you’ll never change” , or in other words “Please stay as you are” is very tricky. On one side, it’s a compliment. The counterpart acknoledges our looks, personality, mind-set, behavior or whatever. Of course such an appreciation is flattering our Ego… On the other side, it excludes any change or growth. Will he/she still like us if we change? It’s a little bit like locking us into a golden cage.

    In the past, I got several times into the situation that another person (mostly a partner) didn’t want me to change. Unfortunately (at his sight), I have the urge to develop, to grow and to learn. I’m curious and like researching, reflecting and thinking about various topics. Sometimes this leads to a subtle change in my attitude or behavior. And that’s when it gets complicated…
    I love change! For me, it’s a sign for growth and development or enlightment. Change offers the opportunity to improve. Paradoxixally, I always assume that a change will be for the better. So probably, I do not only love the process of changing itself (because such a process also can be paintful and full of fear and insecurity) but the chances that it offers and the vision of a good outcome. Even more strangely is that I’m a Taurus – and usually these people are said to love the status quo.

    Needless to say, that the mentioned relationships didn’t last long. My urge for changing and developing were bigger than the love for my partners… And I’m pretty sure that this will never change. 🙂
    I never expected my partners or other people not to change and stay as they are. On the other hand, I don’t expect other people to change, especially like I would prefer them to or think it would be best for all around them.
    I have the feeling that one’s attitude to change is a question of mind-set, as if you tend to see a glass half full or half empty. Some people keep a positive attitude and others defeat it like it would turn the whole world upside down. As so often, it probably depends on one’s own experience with change. If you made good experiences, you likely like it. If you have the impression that it changed your life to the negative, you hate it.

    It’s great that you and Marc didn’t promise each other not to change. I think that true love honors and appreciates the development and growth of the partner. Seeing the partner change also offers a big opportunity to change and develop as well. Growing together is beautiful!

    Hm… this question obvious made me think (and write) a lot, too.

    Enjoy your special day, dear Colette!

    Big hugs,

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