Have you ever been really blocked around a dream you’ve held for your life? Maybe your whole life, since you were a kid?
You know the kind. The dream you think is done, over, gone. You missed your chance, you froze, you had to let it go because of so many reasons. Maybe you think you’re too old, not worthy, not able to, not “x,” not “y,” not “z,” not who-knows-anymore…just fill in the blanks.
I had a lot of disappointment and sadness around a dream of mine. Even though I said it was fine, I had another path, it was OK, I let it go, etc. I felt so unfinished, unclear, not done, and ashamed that I still wanted something that was so obviously not for me.
Or so it appeared when I looked through a particular lens.
The truth was, I eventually realized I did not want the same things at all anymore. Back in the day, I wanted success, redemption, attention, adoration (but not too much, lol). I wanted to bring meaning to people and be the singer-songwriter storyteller like my heroes were—Joni Mitchell, CSNY, Fleetwood Mac, and others.
I wanted to be chosen to “make it” in the smarmy, crappy music business and all that coulda, woulda, shoulda meant, which, in the end, actually didn’t mean what I thought it would.
Not gonna bore you with the entire story. Actually, I will be talking about all this and more from now on, on my Substack!
Yet even though the dream of the business of music wasn’t interesting to me anymore, the creative act of singing, writing, and recording was definitely still alive, but oh so far away.
Oracle Cards actually channel from the same place for me as music. Even though it’s not the same, the intuitive access is right beside it. So I was close, but not really there.
I began doodling about returning to music in the new year of 2024. It was more about rehearsing the freedom of expression music gave me—the joy and the catharsis. I was so blocked. I had lost the music and needed to find my inner artist again.
Three weeks later, I met the Brothers Koren at an event, and that began a long, arduous, terrifying, therapeutic journey back to me. A journey to reclaim that sacred something, but in a way that was more mature, more honest, more real…more me.
The Creative Breakthrough finally came when I completely let go of all the hopes, the attachment to the outcome, and everything other than the pure expression of it all.
I had to be willing to fall on my face and fail and not care.
The brothers have a few places around the studio that say, “Dare to suck”. The result of that doodle will begin to be available next week! Stay tuned for the launch of My Dark Church.
Moral of the story?
Life is short don’t let it pass you by without doing what you always were called to do.
Don’t wait for the fear to leave (trust me it might not) and have courage and be brave. Your Creative Breakthrough may just be around the corner too.
Check out the music, the songs, the stories of the journey of what it’s like to be a woman evolving and emerging instead of aging on my Substack.
I am so excited to share with you that next Tuesday, June 16, I am launching the first single from my new album, My Dark Church!
Love,
P.S. Want to experience your own Creative Breakthrough? Join me for my free Creative Breakthrough Workshop, where I’ll show you how simple drawings can help you move through blocks, reconnect with your inner artist, and open the door to what wants to emerge next. And if you work with clients, you’ll learn how to guide them through this soul-inspired process, too.
