This week our focus is on harmonious relationships (according to my reading for the week!) and so having a look around and seeing who is populating your world is a first step in seeing how you’re singing in or out of tune along with the people in your world.
Relationships need tending, pruning, and watering like precious plants we want to see flower and bloom. But if you are sharing your water until you’re empty so you feel safe, certain, and in control and to please others you’re not doing what’s best for you (or them) at all.
One of the things I needed to shift in my life over the years was this idea that I had to put others’ needs in front of my own, to always be available and to give until I was exhausted when it was demanded of me. I actually got a lot out of that “out of tune” way of singing along with life, as I felt needed (and entitled to whining) but it wasn’t healthy and it certainly wasn’t authentic as I grew to have a lot of resentment. Once I discovered it was my job to set healthy boundaries and to admit when I couldn’t be there, or didn’t know something, and could voice my own needs as well as be accountable for my own self-care, everything changed. I mean everything! Self-worth, self-respect, come to you immediately when you begin to put a relationship with yourself first.
Before that, of course, I had to have a relationship with a Higher Power and trust in my faith in the divine partnership too but even though I had a great relationship in this regard my human ones needed a lot of work. Today, I know how I show up affects others but also I need to be mindful of who I surround myself with. I need harmony and less drama and most of the time that is exactly how my life goes. How about you?
If you were to look at your life, do you have a greater percentage of harmony or drama?
So since we’re in the new cycle of organized service-minded Virgo and Virgo loves making lists I decided to make one as a special harmonious relationship inventory which I’d love to invite you to do too. You will learn so much about the way your relationships work.
Here are some of the questions to ask yourself:
- Who surrounds you with love and compassion, with an open mind and heart?
- How do you treat the people in your life and how do they treat you?
- Do you really know the intentions of the people who approach you, or do you assume you know?
- Do you allow people to manipulate you in any way? If so why?
- Do you want harmony at all costs? What is the cost anyway?
- Look at the six people you spend the most time thinking about. How does this make you feel? What is the nature and pay off for thinking about them so often? Do they deserve your thoughts? If yes why, if no why?
Take a big deep breath and fill up your heart with gratitude for every person in your life is honestly teaching you something about the way you relate.
Harmonious relationships are not always possible (go online much?) but if you remain harmonious in your heart, committing to your own healing, you’ll naturally repel the ones that are not in tune and attract more of the ones you can sing along with.
So when you do your inventory keep in mind we’re all learning how to be human and we all need to learn how to sing in tune. The songs keep changing so keep your heart open no matter what.
Your turn!! Tell me your story.
Love with an open heart from me!