T is for Tenacious, Tenderness and Tribe!!

Updated: November 4, 2013


Dearest Tribe Member of Fabulosity,

I just got back from my old stomping grounds, Toronto, and have much cause to ruminate about what happened there. I was invited to be one of the speakers for the Zoomer Life conference on longevity and well- being. Because I was asked to participate on the Spirit panel, I decided since I had only 17 minutes and was told to deliver a Ted-style talk that I would be launching myself as “just a speaker.” Finally I could just talk, chat about Perspective, the subject of my new book, which is all about “why changing the way we see things changes everything.” Finally the educated mainstream would accept that I was an intelligent person—grounded and well spoken—and would no longer look upon me with skeptical disdain.

This was an audience of educated folks who have never seen my “spirited” side, never known my work as the Oracle (as my clients have affectionately called me and now a title I playfully own) and only knew that I was voted in the top 100 most spiritually influential people in 2013 by the Watkins list. I’m a mucky muck fancy pants now!

All happy and prepared #96 was standing at attention ready to serve with intelligence and wit! So guess what I learned and they saw?

Purpose is tenacious, our calling takes over, and no matter how much we intellectually plan there is a higher consciousness that will use us in service and decides for us what the heck is a gonna come out of our mouths!

I know to allow it when I begin to tingle and hyper-ventilate and get all koo-koo just before I step on a stage. This is what happened.

Suffice to say I spoke and stumbled for about five minutes and the rest of the time I was driven to be the Oracle for some of the audience. I demonstrating how connected we all are, and how longevity doesn’t just mean staying young in body but that our consciousness, our human spirits continue on after the body is dropped and seek to reach out for healing and forgiveness. Surprise!

The tenacity of one’s calling will win when we don’t fight it, when we allow courage to help us with our fears and when we step aside to be used in the service for which we were born.

The tenderness necessary to keep going is what we need to show to ourselves. I admit I am scared of this sometimes. I am always vulnerable to this work and the questions it raises, especially around non-believers and cynics. Yet, I know authenticity is a spiritual act. It’s not always going to be easy. It will not make everyone love you and accept you. To be anything other than that which you’re born to be is to betray yourself and the world. That’s why community is so important.

I know here we’re a tribe of like-minded people who come together to see we are not alone, that our beliefs and some of our rebellious non- conformity has its place and purpose and our willingness to make success not just about material achievements but that third metric of compassion; well-being, acceptance, inclusion and love. This tribe, my tribe is all about supporting one another to stand in our purpose, in our authenticity even if it means we’re sometimes flying our flags out in the fringe. We do it together.

After my talk, although there were plenty of audience members arguing that I had pre-arranged plants in the audience and pre-planned the whole thing, I also heard how my demonstration impacted others. They saw the world through a different lens, and were changed for the better. Three people said I gave them a gift that changed them forever.

Thank goodness the tenaciousness of purpose had a better plan than mine.

Today I am clear, so very, very clear that I too must be courageous and tender and hold myself accountable to my purpose, allowing its tenacity to keep me on track.

Tell me now, have you ever had a situation that you planned for and something else happened through you that was far better than your plan?

How is your purpose leading you? When I say “Man plans, and Spirit laughs” what story from your life does this bring up?

Love to hear from you my sweet tribe.

Always and forever,

The InVision Project
Founder, CEO

If you have a question you would like to ask Colette, write to her at AskColette@ColetteBaronReid.comAll published questions and answers will be anonymous – we honor and protect your privacy. (Please, Colette respectfully asks that you do not request a reading as the anticipated response to your question.)





Showing 29 comments
  • Catherine Pagliaro

    Great share Beauty…glad Toronto was amazing…my life after leaving my childrens father has been the series of Man plans and Spirit laughs…I have so learned to roll and tenancity or persistence or determination whatever the word in collaboration with Creator has kept me on path…my latest is all about the Ego Conflict with my Soul Voice…teaching my EGO it is part of my Soul and Spirit team so that EGO integrates with my Soul in love and harmony over what has lately occurred…Blessed integration and work to assure my EGO understands its wonderful place on the harmonious spirit team…tenacity, tenderness…and love…you Rock Colette…love to all…xo

  • Forever Conscious

    I feel like this is the story of my life (and probably most other people’s too). Sometimes we plan and things end up terrible, and sometimes things work out better, I believe there is beauty in both.
    Firstly, i think its amazing that you are so in-tune to allow spirit to take over (and recognize it as that) because i am sure this would throw many people, especially when getting up to talk to a crowd that may not be open.
    Sometimes, when we plan so meticulously it can be hard to see what spirit is trying to teach us because we are so set in our ways.
    I think doing this stops flow and then spirit is left just waiting and watching us to click it all together!

  • Becki Hawkins

    Bless you!! You are such a Light for so many!! Keep shining!!!

  • R. M. Bork

    In law school, in a course on basic business law, I learned that in starting a business, there is the inherent limitation of “bounded rationality.” Any plan, be it for a business or for having a baby, will always have this limit, unless we accept the guiding spirit that oft times turns plan upside down, inside out. So we plan for a business but instead we have a baby or visa versa. It is best to not take our rational plans too seriously, although we must commit to them with our full spiritual being for only then can will they yield up their best.

    Yes, dear Oracle, we foolish humans plan like children playing house. And to make it real, God plays pranks and let’s us in on the great joke. When we “get it” we get a glimpse of the great mystery.

  • Beth

    “Purpose is tenacious, our calling takes over, and no matter how much we intellectually plan there is a higher consciousness that will use us in service and decides for us…”

    Wow, that hit the nail on the head! Thank you!

    I’ve always joked before that I don’t make plans because as soon as I did, something would happen to change them. This year has been one of learning what my purpose really is as a result of my life going totally topsy-turvy on me and one massive change after another. One step forward, leads to 6 steps back and my only recourse is to say to Life, “Okay, I’ll do it your way.”

  • Layne

    Thank you for writing this!!!! I have been on this spiritual path for many, many years. As a newly sober person (9 months) all my prayers, my study and my dreams get to stick. The richness of my life is beginning to unfold and I am so blessed. I am blessed by reading this, this morning. I don’t know yet what is planned for me, and its starting to unfold. I will keep praying for Spirit’s will not mine and I will use your reminder to step aside and let myself be used.


    Much love,

  • Paul

    Colette, I have to comment on the saying that Man plans and Spirit laughs. I feel more and more strongly that the purppse of life is so that God can know herseld experientially. I also believe that Gos is a collective and that we are individuations of God and as such are in fact the creators. God assists with the reality that we create.

    If by “plan” you mean “create”, spirit is not laughing, they are assuisting. God’s plan is our plan. Life is not a ride, it is a creation of our own device.

    • Colette Baron-Reid

      IT’s semantics but good point, maybe I didn’t make mine clear. My ” plan” was to just speak. Spirit as my co-creative partner.. had another plan. The ego that wants to belong at the cost of authenticity is over-ruled thankfully by Spirit. Yes I believe Spirit manifests through us. You gave me some good ideas for the next blog.. stay tuned.

      • Paul

        I know it is semantics, I was sounding off – you know that. I’m just tired of this idea that we are wind-up dolls, we are so much more as you know.

        • Colette Baron-Reid

          I LOVE that and I agree 1000% with you, we are not wind-up dolls.. we are co-creators, partners.. I just think we can shut ourselves off from our purpose or from our greatest expression when we dictate how things are supposed to be rather than allow ourselves to express ourselves authentically without self contracting. Sound off here anytime 😉

          • Paul

            I’m guilty of that Colette. Thoughts dictate experience but HOW it shows up and (painfully) WHEN it shows up are not in our control. I realize its not that simple. Thanks Colette

    • Donna

      My understanding of the comment as I heard it many years ago while working with clergy is: “Man makes plans and G-d laughs” because while we plan and expect to be in control ……. Spirit will come and intervene ….. taking over in a bigger way that we would have thought and especially more that what our original plan was. Then, moments of awareness – moments of knowing …. Like “WOW” and then, “did this really happen” …….. then, acceptance or perhaps not ……….. not quite sure how to move forward. I really on a very deep level understand where Colette is coming from as, perhaps, she is at a point of needing to acknowledge ever more of her Wonderful Potential as she is the Amazing Inc. from earlier years ………. and, I personally, Honour and Respect this Amazing Woman! xoxo <3 The path of her Life is an understanding of the human potential and she teaches this to so many through her courses. She also give phenomenal guidance with her readings. Very earthy and special in all that she does. xoxo <3 My Love for ALL that Colette gives to OUR wonderful World! <3

  • Glow

    Thank you and bless you for your tenacious spirit Colette! I love and appreciate the confident and vulnerable demonstration of authenticity you depict and share for so many of us that still struggle to understand what that looks like. Your story is very comforting, and triumphant, for an aspiring visionary from the marvelous city of Toronto – a city that gifts with the cool air of an intellectual perspective but in a largely gray place paved with skepticism. Thank you for bringing some light and color back home and helping me have the courage to do the same!

    Bless! =)

  • Bikem

    Ha, Ha, I laughed at this post, because I totally agree..My life coach friend asked me how I planned my life and I said, none of my plans happened but Gods Plan is in perfect place…I supposed to live in Istanbul, I live in USA, I supposed to marry a ballet dancer, I married a computer wizard, it was impossible to have a child, I am a mom of a 8 year old wonder…God had all this in his plan, not my plan but his and by Gods Grace I am living my best life ever…

    It is interesting that I read your post when I did a vision board on my computer for the rest of my life..Lets hope God delivers and has even better plans….

    I am glad, you showed your oracle side and were authentic in Toronto, your home city….There is something about going back and visit cities of our old life stories…

    Blessings, dear Colette, keep up the good work… Love, B….

  • Diana Boles

    Tenacity-the ability to grip on to something firmly —- so grab on firmly to the wind, as the trickster coyote howls and rolls with laughter watching us. So the only thing we can firmly grab onto is a smile. Go with the flow, tribal dancers! Go with the flow. Life is more interesting that way anyway. It will only ever be what we make out of it. Like a pair of patched jeans, what a comfy fit! Spirit moves and we hear the rustles. Before you know it, we’re whistling along because even randomness is not random. Randomness is OUR magnet!

  • David Carter

    My plan was to develop as a healer, but last year I kept hearing a warm voice say “Leave your apartment and get a tent.” There was a big flood and the ceiling collapsed. My landlord didn’t fix it up properly. So I gave my month’s notice. I kept hearing a voice, “Get a tent.” I got rid of all of my possessions and felt fearful about where I was going. Two days before I had to leave, I found an unused tent outside where I lived, wrapped up beautifully. I had a small wheelly – suitcase, it wasn’t big enough to fit my last few necessary possessions. I went for a walk in the small park opposite where I lived. A really big wheelly – suitcase had been abandoned, and my stuff fit it perfectly.

    I walked out the following morning, homeless. Although it was June in England, the weather was like winter. It rained hard and the winds were crazy, but I saw a wolf by my side, and I slept on the beach. The police kept moving me on. I went in a forest and a wren flew down and looked me in the eye. “How strange,” she said, “that great humans are not free to live on the earth with nature, yet the law of life lets me sleep where I choose.” I felt angry that the earth was not mine. But I looked out into the night with the twinkling stars, and I knew I’d find my tribe.

    The next day, I bumped into a girl who I knew vaguely, and she gave me the contact of a man from the Occupy movement, who were fighting peacefully for good use of land. It was five minutes walk from where I was stood. I went to the site, where I found myself with some wonderful indigo children, the beloved of Metatron. For 3 months I stayed surrounded by these passionate objectors, living under the stars, where I gave them angel card readings to help guide them towards the next phase of their lives and remind them all of just how wonderful they were. During this time, I was invited to a Druid ceremony at Stonehenge and was able to stand and touch the stones.

    I’m now living in a place called Appleton. I was wondering why I was here until the other day a newspaper had been left open with an article about Sir Galahad. I googled and read about his journey to Avalon. I didn’t know that Avalon was “The Isle of Apples.” T is for Trust…

    • Eira Kynthia

      Hello David! I like your story, perhaps you’re a short story writer? I did a little research and found that your definition of Avalon isn’t quite correct along your story line. Merlin is a Druid Magician, so the place of Avalon isn’t actually of Celtic origin, it’s of Druid magic. Avalon, in Druid language, means “Land of the Underworld where the mythical Gods live”. Celtic lore does mention Avalon, but not as the Land of Apples (afal is Celtic for apple, which is not aval). In Celtic lore Avalon is the land where King Oberon, the King of the Faeries, lives and reigns. The Faeries are earth angels sent to tend to Asherah’s ‘earth’ garden. The earth garden holds its own magic within the plants and herbs that many tribes and civilizations have used to heal in their medicine.

      In King Arthur and Merlin lore one would naturally tend to stay with the English/British lore which follows the teachings and myths of the Druids. Avalon is the isle where Gods and Goddesses heal heroes for their battle to come.

      I’m Irish-Welsh, so I love to research the old lore. I learned a few things today that have given me enlightenment. So I am grateful to you and your post.

      Go raibh maith agat!!

  • Karen Malone

    Thanks for this Colette… My “Game Plan” was full of STRESS… “What If’s”… DRAMA… etc… we have all been there and done that…. BUT after coming home from a 12 hour flight (Yep… I have Wings as a Flight Attendant)… found a “note” from my former Husband stating he “didn’t want to be married anymore” (18 years together)

    … well that’s when I realized LOUD AND CLEAR… it was time to use someone else’s “Game Plan”… “Coach” a.k.a GOD has been calling the plays right along with my Guardian Angel’s ever since… and I am BLESSED everyday with a “stress free” Lifestyle… amazing opportunities… and miracles around me! I wear my WINGS Proudly… for I more ALIVE and Happier having begun this “renewed” Journey Tenaciously, with much Tenderness from a wonder Tribe of “like minded” Soul Friends…

  • Bridgett

    “The tenacity of one’s calling will win when we don’t fight it, when we allow courage to help us with our fears and when we step aside to be used in the service for which we were born.”

    There are so many things happening in my life right now that I sometimes feel crushed by the catastrophe.

    As Hamlet said, “Why then ’tis none to you; for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. To me it is a prison.”

    Gotta allow courage to step out of the prison.

    Thank you, Fancy Pants!


  • Eira Kynthia

    I love Diana’s input today!! It reminded me to go with the flow and to let randomness be something I “show up” with in my smile to others. To give others my gratitude for what spirit has given me today. I considered my morning to be a total sabotage of what I wanted it to be. Ha!Ha! says Spirit. Ever since I started “waking up” to spirit, Spirit reminds me that my mornings will never be the same glazed-over, dream-state existence again. This morning Spirit chastised me for not listening by allowing me walk 1.5 mile out of my way just to get right back where she told me to go and allowed me to reap the lesson of rushing to accomplish the task of pumping my gas while I was still fuming about the 1.5 mile lesson!! I think the bigger lesson is that I need to remain tenacious in my listening to Spirit. I tell the Divine, “Don’t leave me up to my own life, I’ll just screw it up!” and our Divine Goddess sends me back to Spirit! Oh JOY!! 🙂

    Eira Kynthia

    • Diana Boles

      Bingo, my friend, b-I-n-g-o

    • Diana Boles

      It is a slowness in the midst of hurry. All around you rushes past as you absorb the energy and use it in your senses—-sight and hearing, smell and touch, and taste—-it’s in the air

      • Eira Kynthia

        I was just telling someone else that today…to allow her senses to smell, feel, see, hear, and taste the air and all of the gifts she brings. I’m learning to slow down in the rush around me and to absorb the energy that offers L-I-F-E 🙂

  • Julie Hardy

    Well Colette, I have to say you are fantastic.
    I came across your website one day searching for inspiration and understanding me.
    You truly have a great gift. keep standing tall and shine, you are helping so many people.
    I’m also teaching myself to listen to my soul and not my ego ( that’s a hard one!) you have helped to put a lot of “things” into perspective.

    Just wanted to say thank you

  • Truly

    I had the pleasure of hearing you speak earlier this year in Arizona (truly inspiring stuff). I’m just stumbling across your blog now, & funny I had a very similar experience happen yesterday. I was asked to speak at our local Spiritual Foundation (church). I had 2 lectures written & ready to go. When I got up to give them, Spirit had other plans. have learned to Trust Spirit implicitly, so I ended up talking about Mediumship, its importance, and then about an experience I had last year. Funny how Spirit steps in just when you think you’ve got it down pat. Anyway, thank you for sharing this, as its nice to know that even the big guys have the same struggles as the little guys. Love & Light to you, your family & your fur babies.

  • Kaarisa

    I had an experience of utter debilitating stage fright last year almost a year ago. I felt horrible about myself and was vicious to anyone who would tell me otherwise. The masterclass lady sent me an email saying I was no way advanced enough to take her class. She effectively thought I was crazy because I unraveled emotionally and psychologically. She did say she thought it was technique. I ended up studying with her this year and over a couple of lessons she exhibited much needed support and I have learned a whole lot that I needed to know. Honesty with ourselves about where we are rather than where we would like to be to be whole is the only way to become whole.

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