How to Flow with Change!

Updated: November 4, 2018

Change is sometimes uncomfortable, weird, gawky, and stumbling.  It’s a messy thing…and just when you feel you’ve got this life dance thing down, the beat changes as soon as you think you know the steps, then you start to get dizzy and you have to sit down! Next, you discover you were actually playing musical chairs!

Yeah… I know, you thought your guardian angel was in charge of all that. Oh.. wait now we’re doing the cha cha cha?! I obviously didn’t bring the right shoes!  

Why is it that we think change and transformation have to be graceful and sparkly and shiny and liberating as soon as we consider it?  Why is it that when change happens, we recoil in fear and anger and then expect some magic being to fix it (like now please!) when a little time is what we actually need to adjust?

“But I’m spiritual I know these things.. all is well right? The Law of Abundance states… blablablabla… so why don’t I feel good, surrendered, happy, wise, serene, grateful all the time?”   

Seriously evolving out loud is part Presence and Wisdom, part Ridiculous, part Graceful, and mostly chasing it all around like trying to catch fireflies in a jar.

Is it because when we wake up and ignite our inner Light we think enlightenment means we will all of a sudden become creatures of never-ending joy and awareness? Is it because we think opening up to the deeper layers of Consciousness gives us an intuition that will guarantee that we will know how to avoid all obstacles, and pain and slide over our fear and loss like Elsa in Frozen singing Let it Go? (gosh I can’t stand that song).

When transformation happens it’s more likely you’ll stumble, wonder where your friends went, question why people aren’t thrilled you’ve found your spiritual path, reconsider your job, your purpose and find yourself temporarily lost between worlds.

This is why it’s called The Road Less Traveled not Easy Street.  

You need to be devoted to the whole messy awkward experience. Yes, its also true that extraordinary things happen, that awareness opens up to the truest magic your human self will ever know. But that is the gift for sticking all of it out.

When I consider all of this I think how I hard it was for me when, over a year ago, I lost my beautiful puppy and little soulmate, Sebastian. He died last year the day before we were on vacation. We called our dog sitters every day because we knew the adjustment would be hard for the other two.

Coco sat depressed for a few days and the puppy Bisou was frustrated Coco wouldn’t play with her and so she decided she would forget all her house training and mark the house when our sitters weren’t looking. Good thing my dogs are all under 5 pounds.

When we got home they were suitably pissed off at us, and happy to see us and I was glad of our smaller family but then it hit me like a tsunami. Sebastian was only 3 pounds but there was this huge gaping silence in the house.

And no matter all my wisdom of all things spiritual and meaningful I caved in.  Yes yes, I had asked for a sign on Thursday as I woke up heart aching in my throat and 20 dragonflies managed to come up to the 22nd floor of my hotel in Mexico  to sit on my balcony. (Spirit knows one would not do!) And when I decided it wasn’t enough, a random photograph of my little boy showed up in my feed with a meme saying “Happy Puppy”. There was no way that all could have been “coincidence”. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt Spirit and the spirit of my sweet boy were communicating with me.

Still, I didn’t know what to do. I will be honest I wanted to eat everything in the fridge. I didn’t. But I wanted to escape rather than deal with the change that called for nothing less than surrender and radical acceptance. A trip to the bookstore, research for my Spirit Animal Oracle didn’t help, nor did the organic groceries that always make me feel like I am doing some good in the world. Good for the local farmers, for our bodies bla bla bla.

I still had to go home and walk back in my house.

I had forgotten the steps of my everyday life.

I had to learn a new dance.

Our pack had to be re-defined and re-organized. Even the dogs pecking order changed as Coco awkwardly assumed the role as Alpha (truly a klutzy little thing but determined!)

Both dogs brought their toys to our bed and Coco sat defiantly in Sebastian’s blanket that we didn’t have the heart to take off the bed.

Balding, with a deformed skull, and a bum back leg our once shy loner of a little girl rose to the occasion.

We’ve all adjusted. And, we’ll adjust again as we welcome a third pup into our lives soon again.

It’s not always easy and it’s not always effortless.

I think that is the deepest most simple truth.

You can’t wait to be motivated to do life, you can’t expect to always feel blessed, and you won’t always see that things are for the highest good when they happen. Whether you experience the loss of a family member, an election result you were upset by, or happy with,, your job, your status, or conversely starting a new project that excites you, or finding true love… change, by the way, does not have to be “ bad”.

We all have to allow time for the reorganization of elements to support the emerging circumstances that will help in the evolution of the new you. And, incidentally, time is sneaky and refuses to give even a hint at the new dance steps. You’re just expected to follow along.

And so, we just have to keep dancing. Even if we fall and there’s no one to catch us.

However far down we go, we need to trust the Light within, follow it .. and keep going.

Yes, change is an awkward, gawky dance… but I am not planning on sitting this one out.

Are You?

Anything is possible when you open your connection to the Universe



Showing 44 comments
  • Therese Willging

    Wow, I usually have no problem relating to your post and reading, but this one was like ripping the bandage off. So powerful and spot on. I buried my dad on Friday and have been coming to terms with the before and after of key moments in one’s life.
    I’ve had to deal with so many changes and family fractions lately. The spirit cards emphasized everything I’ve been feeling. Even mirroring a conversation I had early with a cousin also dealing with all of this.
    Thank you Colette for all that you share. I gain so much.
    Love to you, Therese

    • Georgia Woodward

      Thank you so much for this. A very timely piece. People, and situations keep leaving my life, as I move towards a higher evolutionary experience of my own soul’s path. Or I’m leaving them. So many things are no longer relevant except doing the work and my husband and family. The people that were looking for something for nothing have wandered away. And your card ‘ between workds’ Is so meaningful. As I turn 64 next week I am trying to be lighter, focus on the light, and know a new chapter and door will be opening. But still….chocolate cake is beckoning:)

  • Vera

    Beautiful Blog ……..Big Hug for you and furry family.

  • Lisa Francis

    thank you Colette .. you always write timely blogs xox

  • Lauren

    Yup that sounds about right! The Soul (the Divine spark that is us) and the Personality (the part trying to live a life) often don’t appear to be on the same page…..and the communication is often like a radio phone with crackles and static where each has to take a turn…

  • Donna

    A wonderful reading Colette. Thanks so much.

  • ellie

    What perfect timing and words for me right now! Spirit is amazing….

  • Deanna

    Hi this reading came at the perfect time in my life. I have allowed so many people to control my life and I kept getting visions of the peacock. I am about to embark on a big journey in my life. When you really listen and see the world it responds in truth. Thank you for being you. I really needed this one.

  • Anonymous

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! Just the exact message for me today! xoxo

  • Kat

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! Just the exact message for me today! xoxo

  • Victoria-Kennedy: Lohr

    Lovely! Much appreciated! Thank you!💕💖

  • Connie Mercurio

    Perfect timing, of course. 🙂 After having lived in the US for 25yrs I finally made the very difficult decision to move back to Australia. I’m not comfortable with change, it tends to make me an emotional, insecure wreck. But I Know change is a necessary part of life. To discover my unique authentic inspired life Spirit is guiding me to move and asking me to trust that something better awaits. I know I need to take my whole self with me, so I am doing my best to stay conscious, awake, aware and willing. Not always easy. I am very messy, anxious, teary and scared. Hence the purchase of lots of calming herbal teas. 🙂
    This morning I ask WOTO “what do I need to know to help me get thru the next month”? I pulled #34 Leg Up. 🙂 I need to ask for help and allow it when it shows up. I don’t have to do this alone. There are people who will step up and work together to make miracles happen.
    And boy do I need help, I’m moving in a month.
    So grateful to know that Spirit has my back and is right there with me!!
    Thank you Colette, Spirit and WOTO. ♥

    • Marie Geyer

      Colettel is so right (as usual). Connie, I just moved to Australia from the US and it was a traumatic and miraculous project. #34 in protection was my most frequent card and it was hard to accept but since it kept recurring, I realized that I had to do it. Accepting help and recognizing that we need it are hard lessons to learn. We are super, but not superwoman. Accept the gifts spirit has for us. You don’t need to do it alone. Life is wonderful in Sydney and I am so grateful that I ‘let’ Spirit help me get here!! Best wishes for you and a wonderful transition!!!

    • Nancy Lusz

      This blog is something I needed right about now but I was taken aback reading your name since my Mom (who is in her 80’s) had a friend with the same name who went to Australia to do a walk about many years ago and I think she also wrote a book! My Mom is in the process of looking at places to move to and is experiencing the same emotions – your comment is helping me understand that better. Thanks!

  • Jennifer Lewis

    Great story! Yes can never give up!
    Thank you for sharing!

  • Wendy

    Thank you for your message. I really needed to hear that today. I have had my life turned upside down and shake the hell out of me. I am living a different life now one that comes from trust, love and creations. I have a hard time with the “ expectations of being spiritual “ why isn’t it easier, why is it still so hard???????
    I realized that waiting is part of trusting the highest form of love. I need to trust me more ( Are you kidding). The reason I got into this was for answers, I sure as shit didn’t have them and now I’m supposed to trust myself and co-create WTF this is WORK.
    Well I figured I have some time here and I want to have fun, share and see what I can create.
    My dream is to see if we as a race can unify and live our true purpose together. I see the light and I want to show everyone the light

    • Courtney

      I enjoyed and empathize with your comment! Just remember you’re not alone in still figuring this all out. Hugs 💖

  • Courtney

    Hi Colette,
    Truer words were never spoken!
    I empathize with you very much. This has come at the perfect time for me, although I admit, even with your wise words, I’m having a hard time not letting go.
    I’m aware of a lot of actions I can take to make myself suffer less….I’ve employed them but it isn’t helping to the point I need.

    I miss my ex badly. And I don’t want more missing sent from Universe, yet I can’t speak to this person when I think of them and they are alive. I saw him for the 1st time in 2 months the other day. We spoke for 2 hours but it’s been bothering me I didn’t try to hug him (didnt know he’d let me, so didn’t try)…
    I’ve been expanding myself, having a more open mind, getting out more with friends, being more creative, definitely seeing more where I didn’t contribute as positively as I thought to the situation in order not to repeat it, transform for better, while seeing where they weren’t stepping up as well.

    All of this is amazing and positive, yet I don’t like that my soul stirred trouble to have to wake me again and I’d lose him. I thought I’d learned those lessons. Cue Mr. Handsome into my life and watch those triggers/wounds come flying out! Lol
    I wish so badly I’d have moved on these things more while I was with him. Now that I realize better, part of me sees why the break for a moment, but I’m having a difficult time seeing why now that I’ve learned these lessons better and are acting upon them, why can’t we now be together?

    I realize it’s also not just about me, but where he is at and the feelings I’ve left him with over time. Even with realizing I caused emotional hurt as well as he did, my fix it self can’t seem to be able accept why I can’t now show him how great it can be when we’re together bc I love him so much when he lets me in. I even realize that’s attachment and if I love him set him free, but I can’t fully accept it yet. I don’t want to have life without him, so he forced a kind of death upon me of my old self. There definitely are differences between us, but I saw myself with him for life, he discussed that too, and I’m trying to rewrite that mental script, but it’s not easy bc I don’t want to let go of him entirely.

    I pray it will get easier with time, but I feel a piece of my heart is with him. My friends say I’ll look back and wonder why I felt this way about him. When I try to remind myself of that, it’s not working to ease the feelings in my heart for him, even though I know he wasn’t always stepping up the best with me. I’m still in the process of learning and accepting how my life will be without his presence around. Part of me is resisting that bc it means I will have to fully accept we are not together anymore and I want to have hope we will still come together at a later date when we’ve both grown more. When indications currently seem otherwise, it feels like being cast adrift without oars suddenly by Uranus in a foggy Neptunian sea.

    It really does feel like the lotus flower blossoming but still, sitting in the mud.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts…it helps to hear from someone in a similar situation.
    Hugs ✨💜

  • Kathy Sexton

    You are amazing….such perfect timing for such a perfect message full of the spiritual reality I needed to hear!

  • Maryanne

    ❤️💗♥️lots of messeges today. Thank you 🙏 and , of course- the spirit and universe for continued direction and abundance🌻

  • Sharla

    Thx, I needed that🙏

  • Lesley Graham

    I love today’s blog❤️ I am in Oracle School and so many things are moving and shifting bringing up all kinds of things and some overwhelmingly uncomfortable emotions and revealing patterns I was very unconscious of. Your message today was so clear for me: If I want to live life “fully” alive then that has to include it all. Some of my experiences have been so challenging and some fun and exciting, but there has been a gift/blessing on the other side of each experience. Your work is changing my life – thank you. Much love and gratitude.

  • Susan

    Hi Colette, I can truly relate to you with your loss of your beautiful dog. I lost mine a beautiful chocolate Labrador called Fudge this May What a dog he was. He was coming up 13 not bad age. The weirdest thing I was at the vets collecting my boys ashes when I felt something nudge me as I looked down it was a chocolate Labrador. I collected my boys ashes walked out tears running down my cheeks to my husband and told him what had just happened. I felt immediately that it was a sign from my boy letting me know he was ok as though at that time I needed this sign and what better way than from a Chocolate Labrador. Just had to share this with you.
    Many thanks
    Sue xx

  • Thea

    Thanks for this. Last week was rough and today being Monday doesn’t look so bright either. I’m definitely going through transition and releasing old junky But I’m mainly replying because you said you can’t stand that song”Let it Go”
    Thank you for your honesty. I can’t either and thought I was the only one!!
    You rock girl!
    Dotty Thea

  • Josh

    Hi Colette, sorry to hear about your loss! It’s never easy, especially with someone as close as a pet, they’re our dependents and we love them like children. The part where you spoke about him communicating with you through his picture and the fireflies, I believe it. I think he’s still with you, I feel the same way about my Cat that died a little over a month ago. I saw his picture come up a lot on one day, it just kept happening and I felt him with me. I heard from a friend that they stay with us to help us through our grief, which I think is such a lovely idea.

    I think these losses are definitely a good reminder that change is inevitable and sometimes painful but it doesn’t have to be a waste. It will always serve us in some way whether we see it or not.

  • Anonymous

    This was totally excellent. Thank you

  • Susan Retief

    I needed to read this today… so many things happening in my life now…thank you for those beautiful words.

  • TK

    Thank you Collette. You are absolutely spot on and I needed to hear this today. I am walking around missing my beloved birdies which are somewhere out in the universe. I totally know how you feel my love and I am truly sorry for your loss. Change can definitely be unexpected and hard sometimes as we are on this path. I am definitely glad for my more spiritual being that has come into play since my mom passed a little over 2 years ago. And I thank u for being a part of that journey with your inspiring e-mails. You are loved and appreciated 😘💕❤️

  • Carolyn

    Thank you for always sharing and caring so much of who you are and what you are going through, it helps so much! Being that you are an 11 and a dog in a dog year hits home pretty hard too. I’m also an 11 and a dog. Big hugs, much love and I want to hear all about the new pup coming into your life!

  • Deb

    One of your absolute BEST posts ever! You ran the gamut of this messy and often complicated life thang. This is the second time today I’ve heard spiritually “up-there” folks humbly share about their own struggles in this physical journey, despite all they know, which always helps me feel less singled out or alone…including not being able to stand that dang “Let It Go” song, haha! So THANK YOU for once again being so authentic, in order that we can see it’s not “just me.”

    And, congratulations on your 20 dragonflies and Sebastian picture ADCs (yay!), plus your newest adoption to come! And hey, maybe it will even be your little boy, reincarnating to you and your family once more <3. I'm sure you could ask him &/or the oracle cards!

  • Alvise

    So funny and at the same time so very true and inspirational, you have a way of saying things that hits me everytime. 👍 🐶

  • Kath

    Hi Colette❤️ Yay! Thanks!
    Yes we are so much more than our limited thinking, the divine source has our path marked out if we just have faith and release our tight grip❤️ What a week it has been❤️

  • Anonymous

    Hi. For me, changes have always been a challenge to discover and find out more. It’s an integral part of my life and I love quizzes and competitions. So there must be falls, but also victory.
    Happy work.

  • Renee Sugar

    Here is an amusing story which sure didn’t feel that way at the time. After being laid off from a job after 9 or so years, and the death of my mother; I found myself unemployed, and without parents. I had seen an ad in the newspaper looking for people who were willing to work on a 6 month contractual basis on a cruise ship. I remember laughing when I tossed the resume in the mailbox. Then I laughed a little harder when I was invited for an interview. Guess who they offered a job?? Yes little moi!!! Well in order to prepare for this adventure at sea; I needed to let go of everybody, and everything, pack up all of my belongings and prepare to board the ” Love Boat”. Of course living at sea isn’t exactly similar in any way to the lifestyle I had been accustomed to living solo in my own space. Now I had a cabin mate, and slept in a bunk-bed and had to dress in navy from tip to toe. Watch out when you step out of bed to go to the bathroom, lest you fall too the ground when you forgot there was a ladder there. Seemed I was having a bit of difficulty using the Point of Sale system in the boutique where I was stationed. The barcode usually 8 digits long was being read and a guest was charged $120,000.00 by mistake. Simple human error. Well not in the “Navy”. As no one else was having this issue, I was reprimanded and told not to do that again. I really wasn’t cognizant about what I had done to cause this to occur which it did more than once. This wasn’t the only error I made, but human errors do occur in every business on land or at sea. Seems that living at sea was a part of the learning curve I hadn’t yet mastered.
    Long story shortened…….. After 30 days the manager called me in to the captains’ office, and it was decided that I probably wasn’t the right ” fit ” for the culture living at sea or they weren’t going to wait until I had a more thorough understanding of their computer system. So, I was returned from whence I came; paying the fare back home; from all of my earnings, and returned to Toronto with no place to live as I had given up my former home of 17 years, handed in the keys, my phone; and all things familiar to me. GUTS NO GLORY!!! What I learned from that “risktake” is that all the best laid plans don’t always work out; and that this doorway although a very courageous leap in the dark just wasn’t the best place for me to be. I had to start all over again, lived with family for several months until I felt strong enough to find a new living space; and a part-time job. I still live in this building; 20 years later, and have the t-shirt that says Alaska on the front, the name badge in my scrapbook and something to laugh about when I think of the passenger who found the charge for a package of lifesavers on his tab. ” To make a beginning is to make an ending. THE END is where we start from” T.S. Eliott

  • Karen

    My husband and I had some land and we’re going back and forth. Do we keep it/do we sell it. The city is quickly encroaching into our area and it’s only going to be a matter of time before it’s a subdivision.
    So my husband said ‘give it to the Universe’. Don’t you always say that? Wow! I thought. This was a Friday. The following Wednesday a gentleman came to the front door of our home. He asked if I was Karen. I said Yes. He said he owned a business down the road from our land and he’d like to buy it. Well, 3 weeks later, it’s done. We were doing the last Dump Run and a white feather falls slowly down right in front of me at the farm. A purple one landed on my desk at work. That was Mom.
    Property sold; money in the bank. Husbands SO very happy/relieved. I’m sad because it was my grandparents land. My late mom grew up there and I spent a lot of time there.
    The fact that the gentleman showed up; I believe was heaven sent. My hubby says it was all the gossip around farm area. (I’m right😏)

  • Emily

    Timely, as ever.

  • Debbie

    This made me remember two things. One was when my sweet dog Annie died. I was devasted for we were Soul bonded. My grief was very deep but then I realized a week or so later that my other dog desperately needed his Mom to get through his grief. I pulled myself up somehow to be there for him and began to see Cardinals everywhere and in the oddest places. Live cardinals where they really should not have been. I knew it was Annie.

    Flowing with change made me think of a powerful share I heard this weekend regarding God’s will. Best to my memory they shared that there will never be an easier, more comfortable moment to do God’s will. Best to move forward into God’s will and change now.

  • Frankie

    I’m so sorry for your loss. {{HUGS}}

  • Jenny

    A very timely communication Colette. I have a Cat who is 19 1/2 years old whose days are numbered and whilst I say all the right things to myself I wonder how I will truly cope when he goes so I genuinely feel for you with the loss of Sebastian. November is never a good month for our family. I lost my Mother 13 years ago on the 4th, my Dad 27 years ago on the 22nd and my husband coming up 4 years ago on the 26th. I’m still getting used to my new reality but as each day goes by you create a new reality, never probably what you imagined but a new direction for the future and one you learn to deal with as the past is the past, you can’t re-create it and I hold the precious memories close and try to forget the not so good ones and hope I learnt something from them. I have various Set of Cards, several of yours plus others and I seem to be able to pick the ones I need and get amazingly accurate readings which give me comfort. Thank you for your words of wisdom.

  • Tanya

    Unbelievably beautiful post, beautiful sentiments and they way you expressed them. Thank you.

  • Linda S ShottesBouchard

    Thank you Colette
    Much needed read for me.

    Much Love and Gratitude xoxo

  • Andreae

    Hi Colette,
    I hope that your vertigo has improved by not w but if not do check out a homempathic solution called vertigoheel, it has proven in the past to be very effective. And yes I’m sure we all miss the beautiful Sebastian being present in your prescriptions of the past. Love and light to you x

  • Anonymous

    Well, I’m a bit behind & catching up. Colette .. I’ve been following your blogs for years now and while they are all individually and collectively awesome – this one in particular rocked .. and I mean kick-ass – big-time! Not to mention it personally resonates in every way & I needed to be given a spiritual reality check, LMAO. Thank you! On a more somber note, I’ve had my share of separation with fur-loved-ones & relate quite personally. There’s only one major word for it and that’s “Ouch.” Love & Light to you and Mark and the other fur-babies. And Coco!!! Way to step up and rock “fur-sister!” Just like your Mommy! LOL

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